


Paradise Isn't Lost (It Was Hiding All Along)

by Dorian (AmericanaEx0tica)



Series: Going Down, Baby! [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Child Abuse, Demon!Junhui, Demon!minghao, Demons, F/M, Gore, M/M, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Slow Burn, Soonyoung Wonwoo n Seulgi are siblings, bad stuff happens to wonwoo so please be careful, demon!Mingyu, one sided wonwoo/jihoon, seven deadly sins!au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-25
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2020-12-31 16:18:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 33,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21148610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmericanaEx0tica/pseuds/Dorian
Summary: "You seem different.""Bad different? Or good different?""I don't know. It's like you know something... something you probably shouldn't."-Wonwoo's brother is missing and her baby sister is suffering because of it. Things don't seem to be looking up at all - not until life damns her. But it's okay - she embraces damnation with loving arms.But you can't blame her, not really. Everyone pushed her to the edge and she saw no choice but to jump.





	1. chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> The only thing going through her head is Jeonghan and the way she'll make him cry and beg.
> 
> Even if it means damming herself.

Wonwoo's brother disappeared.

It's odd because he works from home and none of the neighbors had seen him leave - his car was still in his driveway when they noticed he was missing which made it even more odd. Wonwoo's mother has dark circles under her eyes and so does her little sister. Things are tense at home - her mother is angry for some inexplicable reason and her sister often cries, worried that something happened to their brother. Her mother keeps her brother's stuff in the garage and Wonwoo thinks it might be part because she hopes he'll come back, part because she wants something to remember him by. Just in case.

Whatever had made their brother leave, Wonwoo was sure he would've told them beforehand. Had it been a debt, a promise, or just because he wanted to leave. Her brother is not one to leave things pending, to leave them worried sick. He isn't that cruel of a man.

Wonwoo is sure Soonyoung didn't leave.

He was taken.

Wonwoo is so sick of being angry all the time, but it's what keeps her going. If she stopped being angry, she would be useless. The anger she feels when she walks into her childhood home to see Seulgi dodging shoes, car keys, plates keeps her going. The anger she feels when she watches her mother breakdown keeps her _strong_.

Because if she doesn't keep going, if she doesn't stay strong - who will?

("If you don't want her, give her to me." Wonwoo had yelled one day, hands gripping her mother's arms until she was sure they would leave bruises. _So every time she sees them she'll remember how she's failed us_, had popped up in her head right before, _she's suffering too_. "I'll take care of Seulgi, just let her come with me. You_ know_ I can do it."

"No." Her mother had croaked, "If I have to suffer, she does too. You do, too.")

Before Soonyoung disappeared, Wonwoo went out to parties every other week with Jihoon. They'd dance and sing, they'd sit and talk for hours, befriend others and have a great time.

In those times, Wonwoo didn't have such a heavy burden in her shoulders 

In those times, her mother wasn't so hysterical and angry and overprotective, even if she couldn't get rid of old habits completely. Nowadays it seems like the mother they had put up with for so long had come back, as if all the work Soonyoung and her had put in to make her a mother worthy of Seulgi had disappeared with Soonyoung.

In those times they all had gotten along so well after years of - of resentment, of bitterness.

Those times are over now.

Now, Wonwoo stays at home with Seulgi, locked in her old childhood bedroom. If she's lucky enough, they'll spend the night in her apartment. If she's lucky enough, there's no mom screeching in her ear over the phone asking about her baby girl because she's too busy locked in her room doing God knows what.

(Maybe it has to do with the trinkets and books she grabs from Soonyoung's stuff.

_They're strange books_. Wonwoo thinks one day.

All they talk about are the beginning of the universe and some she can't even read because she doesn't understand _Spanish_. So all she does is look at the pictures of a beautiful woman cloaked in stars, runs her fingers over them and wonders what kind of unknown stuff Soonyoung was in to. She wonders if he found a nice girl that looks like she jumped out of his books and that's why he ran away. But it can't be - he would've told her the moment he fell in love.

Wonwoo hears the front door open and she leaves the garage in a hurry, clutching a couple of the few books she can understand.

She wants something to remember Soonyoung by, too.)

Now, Wonwoo can't even think of going to the party Jeonghan had invited her to. Even if Jeonghan wasn't her favorite person, she and Jihoon never let a chance to unwind slip by. Now, she didn't even tell Jihoon that Jeonghan had invited her over to his party, because "_Everyone's gonna be there - except you... if you don't wanna go."_

"Give him back! Give him back to me!"

Wonwoo snaps out of the thoughts going through her head. She sighs, getting up and locking the door. Seulgi curls into herself, eyes vacantly staring at the small screen in front of Wonwoo's old bed.

"You bitch, I gave you my everything to keep him and now you take him from me! Answer me!"

Wonwoo turns up the volume.

"Maybe we should sneak out." Seulgi murmurs, eyeing her sister. "We could go to your place. She won't be leaving her room anytime soon."

Wonwoo considers this and ends up shaking her head, "No. She's awake and she could see us trying to leave. She'd be furious then."

Seulgi frowns but knows Wonwoo is right, knows that if their mother finds them sneaking out (she always knows, she somehow always knows, she knows, can probably sense them as they try to leave, can probably _smell_ their intentions - ) there will be hell to pay.

She will get her filthy hands on Seulgi and drag her in, will give Wonwoo no other choice but to go back in and pry her fingers off of Seulgi's arm and will give her no choice but to run into her room and lock the door and stay there until the sun rises.

("I can tell a teacher," Seulgi had said once, when things weren't as bad, when things had just begun, "Then you won't be at fault. I know you want to keep us safe and I know you love her, but she's not well and..."'

_I can't lock her up, she's my mother,_ she had thought, _she gave birth to me, gave me Seulgi and Soonyoung, he will be so upset when he comes back to find her locked up, he will be disappointed, she's your mother, you can't leave her, she's your mother, you can't get rid of her, get rid of her, get rid of her get rid of her get rid of HER GET RID OF HER GET RID - **SHE'S YOUR MOTHER!**_

"We can't. She's our mother, Seulgi." Had been her stern reply.)

"I was invited to a sleepover." Seulgi says, making Wonwoo's eyes snap to her, "It's tomorrow. I can go and we can meet up at your place for the weekend."

_She shouldn't have to think like this, she shouldn't have to run from her own mother, she shouldn't have to go through this, she's only sixteen, she's only _sixteen _\- _

"Yeah. That sounds like the perfect plan."

Wonwoo makes sure Seulgi has her stuff ready to take to school in the morning because if she returns to the house Friday afternoon the - she won't get out again until Monday.

Seulgi falls asleep curled against the headboard. Their mother has been quiet for a long time now so Wonwoo creeps out and checks on her. She's curled up on her bed, a pile of books by her feet and room torn apart. With a shuddering breath, Wonwoo realizes her mother is clutching a picture of her children in her sleep.

Wonwoo feels anger curl in her chest, knows the picture is only in her mother's grasp because it has Soonyoung and not because it has all of them in it. Wonwoo steps closer and takes the photo from her arms a bit too harshly. Her mother whimpers in her sleep, shifting and causing the pile of books to fall to the floor.

Wonwoo takes the picture. She takes it to her room and curls up at the foot of the bed to sleep, picture on the nightstand by her bed.

Early to rise, their mother makes a racket as she makes herself breakfast and leaves to work

(_At least she's still somewhat responsible_, Wonwoo sneers inside her head, _at least she's not completely useless_.)

She waits until she hears the door slam shut and only then does she wake Seulgi. The day goes by without much hassle, nothing new, nothing out of the ordinary. Her shift ends and she says goodbye to Jihoon, to Yerin, to the other few friends she has.

She goes home - her home - with Seulgi, listening to her babble about her day. She gets herself ready, feeling like her bones are made of lead yet weightless at the same time. Is it the guilt she because she didn't tell Jihoon where she was going? Maybe.

She gets ready and then drops her sister off.

"Jihoon calls and you say you're with me at my place."

"Okay. I'll cover for you." She jokes. "I'll see you tomorrow morning?"

"For sure, kiddo."

Then and only then does she drive to the address Jeonghan had given her.

She was having a nice time until Jeonghan had ripped a guy off of her and dragged her to the basement with the excuse of, "We're gonna play truth or dare."

Would it had been better if she had told Jihoon? Probably. Did she? No. What's done is done and now there's no going back.

-

"My, my." It says, "You look terrible."

In Wonwoo's defense, she didn't think summoning a demon with a bit (a lot) of anger, blood and half assed gurgling would actually work.

Wonwoo tries to speak, blood coating the inside of her mouth and rising up her throat. She's slumped against a tree, fingers bleeding from clawing at the roots and bark in an attempt to get up.

Wonwoo bows forward, the blood from her mouth dripping in a steady rivet onto the floor. She doesn't want to look at It, doesn't know which eye to look at, which limb, which tail, which mouth, which set of teeth, tongue, claws, beak -

"Hm..." The sound of dragging and slithering and clawing rings in her ears while a black, scaly tendril comes to wrap around Wonwoo's throat, forcing her to face It. "What is it that you want."

Wonwoo whimpers, tries to say _help me, go away, kill them, kill me_. She tries to say something but the only thing that spills out of her mouth is blood.

She should be dead by now, she knows, but everything around her looks grey and bleak, she can't hear the rustling of night critters, and the stars and moon are nowhere to be seen._ You're not dead,_ a tiny voice giggles in her ear,_ but you're not alive._

It shifts (all limbs and mouths and eyes) -_ everything_ shifts and shrinks, bones crack, and the smell of rotten flesh gets stronger and Wonwoo's mind reels as It takes a more humanoid shape - a tall. thin man squatting down in front of her. It has eyes that in any other situation Wonwoo would find cute, a shock of white hair that clashes with tan skin in the best way possible.

For a moment Wonwoo wonders if the man kneeling in front of her had once been Its original form or if he was just something made up to lure in prey.

"Tell me what you want." It says, teeth still sharp and a hand around her throat, nails digging in painfully. "Tell me."

Wonwoo gurgles again, choking when she tries to say _kill them, kill them, kill them, help. me._ and blood splatters across Its face. It doesn't even flinch, only sneers like Its running out of patience.

"Alright. I'll fix you." It says, letting go of her and watching as she slumps back down against the tree.

Wonwoo can't see Its face anymore, can only look at Its feet through dropping eyes. She shouldn't say yes, should probably tell It to go away, should try to leave or ask It to kill her. Wonwoo knows that if It fixes her, she'll owe It something.

But the only thing going through her mind is Jeonghan who laughed when she begged for help, who laughed at her cries for mercy. The only thing going through her mind is Jeonghan and the man who watched as Jeonghan's doe eyed friend had his _fun_.

Jeonghan who started it all when he pushed her down and told the man with doe eyes to _go ahead, have a taste_.

Jeonghan who looked her in the eyes while she screamed and wept, Jeonghan who barked at a stranger to bring a knife, Jeonghan who pried her mouth open and cut out her tongue so she would_ shut the fuck up already_, Jeonghan who waited until everyone left and dragged her into his car and dumped her in the park.

"You should've known better." He had said, left hand grabbing one of her legs and right hand waving the same knife he had cut out her tongue with. He had dragged her to the river that cut through the park before pushing the knife into her stomach nice and slow several times. "Why else would _I _talk to you, much less invite you to a party?"

Wonwoo had only stared up at him, pictures and words flashing through her mind. And she suddenly realised why her mother spent most of her time locked in her room, she understood why she had all those book in her room, realised they weren't just to remember Soonyoung.

Wonwoo stared at Jeonghan, her hand coming to dip inside her mouth and draw on the concrete with the blood smeared on her fingertips.

Jeonghan had only watched, the dim moonlight illuminating his furrowed brows. "You're insane." He had said softly as he watched her spit and gurgle, "No one can help you now. Not God. Not even the Devil himself."

Jeonghan pushed her into the river.

The only thing going through her head is Jeonghan and the way she'll make him cry and beg.

Even if it means damming herself.

So, Wonwoo tilts her head back with what little strength she has and looks It in the eyes.

Whatever It sees in her face It must like because It laughs, loud and high pitched, showing row after row of sharp teeth, making Its face twist in a way that has Wonwoo pressing herself against the tree next to her. Her mind says_ go, leave, get away_ and she suddenly feels regret and vomit rise up her throat.

_But it's too late now_, a tiny voice hisses. _It's too late_.

It takes Wonwoo by the hair, pulling her up like a string doll. Wonwoo's scalp screams in pain, and Wonwoo wants to fight but can only weakly kick out in protest. The thing's other hand comes to grab her by the jaw, forcing her to open up. It looks her this way and that, moving her head from side to side as if It's checking her over. It lets go of her hair, holding her up by just the jaw. Its expression smooths out - there's nothing, no malevolence, no sick glee... just a tranquility that makes Wonwoo start to panic again.

"It's okay - I'll fix you." It mutters before shoving an arm down her throat.

Wonwoo claws at the arm, eyes burning with tears and her jaw giving a sickening pop as it opens wider than it should. 

She feels Its claws scrape the insides of her stomach, feels something burn itself onto her flesh from the inside, can almost smell it.

It rips Its arm out, letting vomit and water and black thick goop splatter at their feet. Wonwoo's jaw hangs as she gasps for air._ It hurts_, she wants to say,_ it hurts_. It grins at her with sharp teeth (like It knows what she wants to say, what she feels) before sliding three sharp claws into her mouth.

Wonwoo can feel the claws pinch the stump of what's left of her tongue before It tugs. It tugs hard and Wonwoo feels her mind scramble to stay awake. Her tongue starts to grow, she can feel flesh knitting itself back into the shape of her tongue. It keeps tugging until her new tongue is just a tad too long and Wonwoo's only thought is,_ how am I supposed to hide this from Seulgi?_

It snaps Wonwoo's jaw back into place, licks the corners of her mouth and Wonwoo can feel the flesh knit together so the skin is smooth again.

A high pitched ringing makes her head feel like it's swelling, makes her feel like her head will explode soon. The ringing keeps going, even after It lets Wonwoo crumple to the floor.

"I'll see you soon."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi hello hola!  
first of all: title insp by red carpet grave by marilyn manson
> 
> second of all: it's been a long time lmao  
please tell me what you think about this, ive had this on my mind for quite some time and ive just now have gotten the inspiration to write it. thats why ive been so inactive, because i cant concentrate on anything else lmao
> 
> unbeta'd so pls feel free to point out mistakes i guess?
> 
> ive never done this before but this time ill have a schedule so... the next chapter will be released next friday because why not u know?  
im super excited to shared this with u guys :((((((( pls tell me what you think abt it?  
i lov u all, i hope you enjoyed it and ill see u on friday!


	2. chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What would I do without you?"
> 
> "Murder people, probably? Disappear to look for Soonyoung? I dunno, crazy stuff."

Wonwoo wakes up vomiting.

The vomit is thick and black and it burns all the way up. She's clawing at her throat, trying to soothe the burn, and the ringing that woke her up grows frantic with Wonwoo until it's all she can hear.

_My tongue_, Wonwoo thinks, _Where is my tongue?_

Wonwoo shoves three fingers into her mouth, trying to find her tongue and she screams when she sees something wriggling in her vomit. Her eyes tear up because oh, her_ tongue_! She had lost her tongue! It hadn't come for her at all, hadn't given her tongue back!

"My tongue." She croaks out, blinking slowly when she hears her voice. "My tongue."

She looks around. She's still in the park, cold and wet. She's not _in_ the river, she's next to it. Goosebumps spread all over her skin as she scrambles to her knees, leaning over the shore of the river to look at her reflection. Her shirt is torn and bloody, her skirt too. Her rings are missing, some of her earrings and her bracelets too. Wonwoo lifts up her shirt to look at her stomach, expecting gaping holes except -

Her stomach is fine. No wounds. Not fresh ones at least - where there once were wounds, there are now thin, pink scars. It's as if what had happened to Wonwoo had been years ago. But just between her breasts and a little lower, (_where your stomach is_, a tiny voice says, _where I scratched and clawed at, where I claimed you._) there is a black circle, the size of a quarter. It doesn't look like a mole or a birthmark, it's more like a tattoo. It has lines that crisscross in a way that make no sense to Wonwoo, but seem to have a purpose.

_Remember the books, remember the books! Remember._

Pictures flit through her mind like a swarm of birds and something is whispering in the back of her mind.

She can feel the answer in between her fingers and she tries to get a firm grasp on it, but it wriggles away.

Behind her, the sun starts to rise and with it the voice telling her to remember starts to fade. 

Getting to her feet, Wonwoo wraps her arms around herself. Her heels hurt her feet, but she doesn't mind. It reminds her that she's not _dead_, she can _feel._

She's sore, sore all over (_sore all over, all over, all over, sore and filthy and filthy and sore, all over,** all over**_) and she wants nothing but to go home and rest.

She's holding her shirt closed with one hand as she walks back home, other hand holding onto whatever she can so she won't topple over. She's scared Seulgi will notice that something's wrong when she gets home, scared she'll ask questions. Wonwoo won't tell her the truth - _never_ \- but Seulgi is smart and nosy.

"Hey baby, where you goin'?" Wonwoo feels her skin crawl and she bends over to vomit on the side of the street.

"Get the fuck away from me." She rasps, spitting at the strange man's feet and wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

"Hey, now, don't be so rude," He says, extending a hand in her direction.

Wonwoo glares, fury spreading through her. "I said _fuck off._"

"Hey, I just want to - "

"Fuck off! Fuck off, fuck off, _fuck off! _Leave me alone or I'll fucking tear you apart!" She's crying again and she doesn't know why. The man in front of her stares in horror as Wonwoo sobs, chest heaving as she tries to curl into herself. Humiliation spreads through her and she furiously wipes her face clean, "Go away."

The stranger turns around and leaves, muttering to himself, leaving Wonwoo scared and alone.

It takes a long time for her to stop crying.

-

The way the blood in Jeonghan's face drains when Wonwoo shows up to work is worth gold. The look on his face when she talks is priceless.

She struts in with confidence she doesn't quite have, hair loose and heels clacking on the tile floor. Jihoon smiles at her, eyes glittering and relief clear in his eyes.

(She had called in sick on Saturday, had called Jihoon afterwards to tell him she wasn't going to show up.

"Why? What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything! Why do you always assume that I did something?" Wonwoo slurred out awkwardly.

"Wonwoo, are you drunk?"

"No! I'm fine, I just feel a little queasy and I've been throwing up, so I'm gonna stay in today. Besides, I have Seulgi at home and you know she doesn't like staying alone.")

"Check it, I have a tattoo." Wonwoo says once they're on lunch break. She pulls up a picture she had taken of the mark on her stomach to show Jihoon, "You like it?"

"That looks pretty old." Jihoon frowns, eyes flitting to the pink lines that surround the mark and Wonwoo prays that he doesn't ask, not now, "Since when do you have it? And what does it even mean?"

Wonwoo shrugs, rolling her head and letting it loll while looking at the ceiling through half lidded eyes, "I dunno. Saw it on one of the albums they had laying around and liked it."

Jihoon straightens up, leaning against the counter in the break room, and folding his arms across his chest. "I'm hurt, why didn't you tell me when you got it?"

Wonwoo eyes drag away from Jeonghan to Jihoon, mouth twisted into a cruel smile that softens up when she locks eyes with her best friend, "Honestly, I forgot about it and I kept meaning to tell you, but it's escaped me."

Jihoon nods, reaching over to squeeze her arm in reassurance.

Wonwoo tries not to grimace, tries not to pull away harshly as she grabs Jihoon's hand in her own.

"She's getting worse." Wonwoo says, tracing the back of his hand with her free hand. "She screams at Seulgi, at me, at _nothing_ \- we fight more and more as the days pass."

Jihoon looks over his shoulder to Jeonghan, who has his earphones on and is deathly pale, staring at the store bought sandwich on the table. His eyes keep flicking over to Wonwoo and to the seat in front of him every so often.

"He'll show up soon, I'm sure. He'd never leave like that, never."

"I know."

"I'm sure the police - "

Wonwoo grips Jihoon's hand harder, doesn't notice the way he grimaces and squirms - just glares at the tile floor underneath them, "The police are a bunch of assholes, they've done nothing." Wonwoo spits out.

The police department hadn't contacted them in weeks, the last update they gave her family was that they were still looking for more clues as to where Soonyoung could've gone.

"Wonwoo..."

Wonwoo lets go of Jihoon, stepping away from him to sit next to Jeonghan on the table.

Jeonghan looks startled, ripping his earbuds out and blubbering before Wonwoo has even opened her mouth, "What do you want? What, what, what do you_ want_?"

Wonwoo only smiles, "Killer party you had, Jeonghan."

Jeonghan flinches like Wonwoo had struck him with the back of her hand without taking her rings off. If Wonwoo imagines hard enough, she can see the bright red marks on his cheek, can see the scratch her jeweled ring left on the high of his cheekbone -

"Look," He says, licking his lips. "I'm sorry. I really am. Just - "

"What do you say..." Wonwoo says in a low voice, "If we have a party, just you and I? Hm?"

Jeonghan leans away as Wonwoo leans forward. "What?"

"You heard me." Wonwoo says, "You see, some of my stuff is still at your place. I'm planning on dropping by one of these days and having a little... _chat_ with you. What do you say? Either way I'm not really thinking of giving you much choice."

Suddenly Jeonghan is furious. "You can't make me do anything." He says lowly, hands curling up. "You can't make me do anything I don't want to do."

Wonwoo curls her lips in disgust and anger, "You owe me!"

Jeonghan flinches back, staring at a point over Wonwoo's shoulder and then to the seat across from him.

"Look at me!" Wonwoo screeches, leaning forward to grab Jeonghan by the jaw, "Look at me you coward! Or are you suddenly unable to look me in the eye?"

Jihoon's eyes go wide and he lurches forward to stop his best friend, but the look she casts over her shoulder makes him freeze and makes him go back to where he was leaning on the counter, staring down at his cup with empty eyes.

Jeonghan can feel Wonwoo's nails dig into his skin, pinching and he is almost sure he can feel something tickle down his throat. His hands come up to tug at her wrist but she's stronger than he is and it might have something to do with the shadow looming over her shoulder.

"You owe me big time, Jeonghan." Wonwoo hisses, pulling him close so they can both feel each other's breath. "You owe me and I will take what I want from you."

Jeonghan glares at Wonwoo, wonders why the seat in front of him is suddenly empty and he has the terrifying thought that he's alone. Jihoon is blankly staring at his coffee and nobody else is with them in the room - even the clock stopped ticking.

"You owe me and I will take from you what I see fit." Wonwoo seethes, "If I want to shove my hand down your throat and pull out your heart, I will do it. If I want to split your skull open and dig through your brain, I will do it. And if I want to bring you back after I do that, then, by God, I will bring you back."

Jeonghan blinks, tears blurring his vision, warm puffs of his breath hitting Wonwoo across her cheeks and Wonwoo relishes in the way he looks at her with hatred and terror.

Wonwoo smiles, expression softening and she leans forward to peck Jeonghan on the forehead. "I _own _you now."

Jeonghan flinches, but doesn't try to pull away.

Wonwoo let's go of Jeonghan, stands up and goes back to Jihoon.

"Jihoon?" She says, brow furrowing, waving a hand in front of Jihoon's face. "You there, bud?"

Jihoon blinks frantically, lurching forward to grab Wonwoo by the shoulders.

"Wonwoo, don't!" He gasps, paying no attention to the warm coffee staining his shirt. "What are you doing?"

Wonwoo stumbles back, pulling away from his hands, lower back hitting the edge of the counter and making her hiss in pain. "Jihoon, what is going on?"

Jihoon blinks, head swiveling between Wonwoo and the seat where Jeonghan once sat. He tries to grab Wonwoo but she just clasps his hands between hers.

"What?" He breathes, "Where's Jeonghan?"

"He went out to eat lunch? Are you okay, Jihoon?"

"Wonwoo he was just here." Jihoon looks stressed out and Wonwoo feels a little guilt pool in the center of her chest. It sloshes back and forth as she smooths Jihoon's hair back, it rises up until she can taste it in the back of her throat. "You were trying to hurt him - "

(_You should've killed him. You should've dug your thumbs into his eyes and chewed out his tongue, should've gotten it over with!_

_Shut up_, Wonwoo says, _shut up, shut up, shut up!_)

"Jihoon, babe, Jeonghan hasn't stepped a foot in the break room. He went out to eat, remember?" Wonwoo holds Jihoon's face between her hands, brows furrowed in a way that makes Jihoon instantly relax.

"Dude, I'm going insane."

"Jihoon, if all of my problems are a burden - "

"No! No, not at all. Besides, Soonyoung is my best friend too. All of this is definitely my business."

Wonwoo frowns, leaning down to rest her forehead against his shoulder, still holding onto his hands, tangling their fingers together. She feels him rise on his toes to make things a little more comfortable and she mourns the days where she had to reach up to hug him.

"What would I do without you?"

"Murder people, probably? Disappear to look for Soonyoung? I dunno, crazy stuff."

Wonwoo laughs, stepping back, "You're the bestest friend a gal could ever have, 'hoon."

Jihoon's heart squeezes in his chest, "Wonwoo - "

"Wonwoo, the boss is asking for you!" Yerin sings, peeking from behind the door. "Unless you're busy..."

Jihoon flushes yet Wonwoo doesn't bat an eye, "Tell him I'll be there in a second."

Wonwoo turns to Jihoon, plucking at his shirt. "You should change, I know you have an extra shirt somewhere."

Before Jihoon can say anything else, Wonwoo leaves.

-

"How was your day? Did you feel sick at all?" Seulgi asks as soon as Wonwoo opens the door. Jihoon slips in behind her and Seulgi instantly brightens up, "Jihoon!"

Jihoon smiles back and winks, "How's my favorite gal doing?"

"I don't know, I just asked her how her day was." She replies slyly. Jihoon laughs, a little too loud and a little too nervously and Wonwoo rolls her eyes.

"Sit down, I'll order something to eat. I don't wanna cook today."

Wonwoo goes to her room while Jihoon and Seulgi make themselves comfortable on the couch.

"So, what happened to her car?"

Seulgi shrugs, "I don't... know." She looks in the direction of Wonwoo's room nervously, "I wasn't supposed to tell you, but... She went out Friday night."

Jihoon frowns. It makes sense why she had called in sick and didn't have her car at the moment, but... Wonwoo wouldn't of had tried to keep that a secret from him, doesn't have a reason to. What gives?

"Oh... Maybe she left her car at her friend's house."

"She was throwing up all day yesterday." Seulgi says quietly so Wonwoo can't hear her. "It was all... black. And chunky."

Jihoon looks at her, startled, "What? Did she go to the hospital? What the fuck!"

"I got scared and I told her to go but she wouldn't. She kept insisting she was okay. She stopped throwing up around six, but she looked so worn out and so... weak." Seulgi looks at Jihoon, eyes teary and scared, "I heard whispers coming from her room and the bathroom and I kept thinking of Mom - "

"Hey - Seulgi, everything's okay!" Jihoon says, reaching over to smooth her hair in reassurance, "I'll talk to her, alright? Don't worry about a thing. We won't lose her either, I'll make sure of it."

Seulgi wipes her eyes with her sleeve, leaning against Jihoon, "If she doesn't end up marrying you, I'm gonna be so pissed."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rlly suck at schedules, huh?  
Let me know what you guys think!


	3. chapter three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He deserves no forgiveness. He will burn in my hands, I will make. Him. Pay." Mingyu hisses - and Wonwoo just really wants him to shut the hell up.

It shows up in the middle of the night.

It takes the shape of a cat, climbing onto her bed and sitting next to her head.

Wonwoo can't hear the cars outside or the dripping from the kitchen faucet or Seulgi tossing and turning from her own room. A glance out her window reveals a black sky, the light from the streetlamps looking gray.

"Well, you certainly look better."

It's strange, Wonwoo thinks, to have a cat speak to you in a low, quiet hiss. It's how a snake should talk, not a cat.

"Sit up - let's have a _little chat_."

"About what?"

"Our deal of course! Silly girl, what else would we talk about?"

If cats could grin, this one would be grinning meanly, mockingly, condescendingly.

Dangerously.

Wonwoo sits up and moves to the foot of the bed, careful not to give her back to that damn cat. She blinks and the next thing she knows, It's lounging on her bed in the second form she had seen It take. The man. The ethereal man with white hair and tan skin.

"First things first: call me Mingyu."

His voice is low, smooth, rumbling. Like the distant sound of thunder.

"You have a name?" Wonwoo asks, not really interested yet doing so just to have some sort of chatter going on. She doesn't like the unease of silence between them.

"Of course. I was human once."

<strike>It</strike> Mingyu sits up, leaning against the wall behind Wonwoo's bed, "Now, tell me: what do you want?"

Wonwoo breathes in deep, "Well... I want Jeonghan dead. I want the man..." Wonwoo feels her hands tremble, tangles them in her hair and squeezes her eyes shut, "the man who touched me - I want him dead. I want the one who just _watched_ dead. I want Soonyoung back. I want him to be alive and well. I want Seulgi to be happy. I want a lot of things, but I don't know what you can or can't do."

Mingyu had only stared at Wonwoo the whole time, grinning in a way that makes Wonwoo cringe in disgust. "You are so... lovely." He says, "So raw, so simple, so pure, so... _lovely_. Such a perfect start."

"I want to know what you _can_ and _can't_ do." Wonwoo presses, speaking through clenched teeth.

"I can give you everything you want. And more." Mingyu coos in a way that makes her instinctively relax until she remembers who she's dealing with. "I can give you the whole universe if you so wish."

"And what do I have to give you?"

Mingyu grins again and something about it unsettles Wonwoo. She doesn't know if it's the way it stretches so Wonwoo can see the sharp teeth in his mouth, if it's the way she can't see the whites of his eyes and can only see the color black, through and through - maybe it's because the smile looks like a threat more than anything.

"A sacrifice. Devotion." He whispers and it sounds like he's right next to her, all around her, instead of the other side of the bed. "Loyalty. I have plans and I think you'd be of great help."

Wonwoo can't breathe properly, feels goosebumps bloom across her skin as Mingyu shuffles forward. He's in front of her, _(too close, too close, too close)_ and Wonwoo can't move at all. "I will give you everything you want. I'm the only one you can wholeheartedly rely on from now on."

He's still whispering, hands hovering over her face like he wants to touch her but knows the thought of it makes bile rise up her throat, like he knows it would make her scream in fear and humiliation and hundreds of other things she doesn't quite know what to name. The way he hovers and looks her in the eye is like he's telling her that he knows it would completely and utterly break her if he did, that he knows it feels like a threat to her.

That it _is_ a threat.

Mingyu laughs, pulling back. Wonwoo blinks, panting hard and scrambling off her bed, back hitting the door to her room. Her heart is racing, her muscles locking up and making her tremble as she slides down the door. Her vision blurs and she can't hold back the strangled cries that come from somewhere in her.

_Shut up, shut up, shut up! You'll wake her up, you fool. Shut up! Seulgi will hear you, she'll find out, Jihoon is on the couch, he'll **find out -**_

Wonwoo slaps a hand across her mouth.

Fear turns into rage as she realizes that she has to get Mingyu out. _Out, out, out! _She can't let anyone see him, they'll _know_.

"Seems like we won't be able to seal our deal right now. Very well. I have something to give you," Mingyu doesn't seem bothered by the way Wonwoo is heaving in huge breaths, crouched on the floor. "You'll need to wear it from now on. Don't take it off, do you understand?"

Wonwoo doesn't respond, only glares at him from her position.

Mingyu stands, placing something on her nightstand. "Wear it or I'll have to come back and put it on you."

"Leave!" Wonwoo screams, fury building in her until it's all she can feel, all she can taste, all she can see, "Get the fuck out!"

"Do you understand, Wonwoo?"

"Get out! Get out, out, out, out!" She yells, stalking forward and pushing Mingyu with all her might, "Out!"

"Wonwoo, do you understand?"

"Out! Leave! Fuck off!"

"Wear the necklace, Wonwoo!"

Wonwoo is yelling unintelligibly, shoving at Mingyu. Mingyu grabs her, hand on each side of her face, gripping until she yells out in pain and claws at his hands.

He's furious and bellowing, a great contrast to how he had spoken to her when offering her the whole universe, "Wear the necklace, Wonwoo! Wear it! Do you understand? Wear it!"

"Get out!" She yells, "Get out!"

"Wear it! Wonwoo! _Wonwoo!_"

"I'll wear it, just get the fuck out!"

"_Wonwoo!_"

Wonwoo sits up, sweating and struggling against the hands grabbing her. "Get out! Get out! Out!"

"Wonwoo! Please stop!"

Seulgi.

Wonwoo stops, head pounding and ears ringing. Jihoon is gripping her by the shoulders, her sister standing next to the bed. Her eyes are wide with horror, hand clasped over her mouth to muffle her sobs.

_Wear it! Wear the necklace, Wonwoo!_

Wonwoo's breathing rattles her chest, a pulsing in her head making her groan in pain.

_Wear it! **Wear it!**_

Wonwoo shoves Jihoon off her, "Where is it? Where is it!"

"Wonwoo - "

_Wear it!_

"Where the fuck is it!" Wonwoo yells. Tears are blurring her vision and she can't see the damn necklace anywhere, aggressively searching through her nightstand. "Where is it!"

She climbs off ber bed, crouching to look under her bed and nightstand. It's too dark and her head pulses insistently, making things much worse.

"Turn on the light. Someone turn on the light!" Wonwoo begs, clutching her head.

Her room floods with light and her eyes hurt but it's nothing compared to her headache. She goes back to searching for the necklace, wiping her eyes dry, trying to focus as best as she can with Jihoon and Seulgi trying to talk to her, her headache and Mingyu screaming at her.

_Wear it!_

"Then tell me where the fuck it is!" Wonwoo yells back. She grows restless, tossing her pillow behind her and flinging her sheets off the bed.

Something clinks on the floor and her head stops pulsing when she sees the necklace on the floor. She feels Mingyu's hands hovering over her face and then the pulsing starts again, twice as bad.

Wonwoo makes a dive for it, kneeling on the floor as she fumbles with it until she turns to her sister and Jihoon.

"Help me." She says, eyes darting back and forth between the two of them, "Please help me."

Seulgi moves forward with an urgency Wonwoo appreciates, Jihoon moving to kneel in front of her. It looks like he wants to hug her, but knows Wonwoo wouldn't appreciate it.

As soon as the necklace touches her neck, the pulsing stops and Wonwoo sags in relief. She stays on the floor - doubled over, forehead touching her knees and clutching her head as she breathes in deeply, trying to forget the sensation of hands hovering over her face.

-

When she wakes again, her head is heavy. Everything is dull yet too vibrant. Everything hurts to look at, every sound grates on her nerves. She wishes everything were in black and grey so it wouldn't hurt so much to look at.

Jihoon has Mondays off and had offered to pick up Seulgi from school so she didn't have to take the bus to her mother's house. So they can all rest a little easier for one more day. Wonwoo had been grateful, hugging Jihoon from behind, his arms trapped under hers so that even if he wanted to hug her back he couldn't.

It made things easier, knowing Jihoon would be in her home with Seulgi, both of them waiting for her.

"We'll have to talk, sooner or later." Jihoon said softly and Wonwoo felt her heart shrink at his cold tone, "You've been weird recently and we need to know why. Seulgi is worried sick."

"I know. And I'll explain as much as I can soon, but... Just give me some time."

Wonwoo walks into work, heels clicking against the tile floors with dark circles under her eyes and a frown on her face.

Her boss asks if she's okay to work, offers to give her the day off. Wonwoo denies the offer, smiles at her boss the best she can and tries to get her work done.

The whole day Wonwoo avoids Jeonghan, afraid she'll lose her temper if she so much as looks at him. The last things she needs is to throw a fit in the middle of the office.

_Throw a fit? What you do is not throw a fit, it's letting everyone know not to cross you_, Mingyu says.

Wonwoo doesn't repy, only tries to drone out his whispering.

Jeonghan avoids her too, if the way she doesn't hear him or sees him all day says anything. Normally, he'd be all over the office, gossiping about so-and-so doing this or that.

"What do you think happened? He's been awfully quiet since Sunday." One coworker whispers to another.

Wonwoo tries to look like she's not eavesdropping, fingers fiddling with the necklace around her neck.

"I don't know, but he keeps whispering to himself and he won't leave his desk at all. It's so weird."

Wonwoo feels a smile tug at her lips at the thought of Jeonghan cowering at his desk, whispering to himself. How pathetic.

Feeling a burst of energy, Wonwoo leaves her area, folder in hand, and makes her way to Jeonghan's desk.

When he spots her, Jeonghan goes pale.

"Hello." Wonwoo says, "How are you Jeonghan?"

Jeonghan licks his lips nervously, glancing around, "What do you want?"

Wonwoo hums nonchalantly, picking up a photo off of the desk and dropping the folder in front of Jeonghan, "Just wanted to drop by. Give you some papers to sign." Wonwoo turns the photo around, leaning on Jeonghan's desk, "This your family? Mother, father, siblings?"

Jeonghan turns away, picking up the folder Wonwoo had dropped on his desk. "These the papers you want me to sign?"

Wonwoo frowns, "I asked you a question, Jeonghan."

"Yeah. That's my family." Jeonghan says after a pause, speaking through gritted teeth. "What about it?"

"You're lucky." Wonwoo replies, setting the photo down on the desk, "What a beautiful family you have."

Jeonghan doesn't repy, only stares.

_He deserves no forgiveness. H__e will burn in my hands, I will make. Him. Pay. _Mingyu hisses - and Wonwoo just really wants him to **shut the hell up.**

"What a beautiful family." Wonwoo says again, slowly, "Sign these papers please! I have to give them to the boss by the end of the day."

Jeonghan takes in a shuddering breath, signing the papers before handing them to Wonwoo.

"See you later, Jeonghan."

-

"You look like hell." Yerin says, not unkindly, "What happened?"

Wonwoo blinks at her sandwich, twisting a ring around her finger. Her right hand plays with the necklace around her neck, and instead of breaking down Wonwoo says, simply, "Nightmares."

Yerin has a sympathetic look on her face and Wonwoo wants to wipe it off her face, wants to yell at her because she doesn't _know_, can't even begin to understand a _quarter_ of what she does.

_She didn't do anything wrong_. Wonwoo reminds herself, relaxing her shoulders and smiling at Yerin, even if she knows it'll look bitter and forced.

_She doesn't understand, never could, doesn't know, doesn't understand, she's so happy, what did she do to deserve all that ignorant bliss?_

Wonwoo ignores Mingyu. Yerin did nothing wrong and Wonwoo wishes her no harm.

"Nightmares?" Yerin probes, tucking hair behind her ear. "About what?"

"Is that a new ring?" Wonwoo asks instead, reaching over to grab her hand. "It's so cute, who gave it to you?"

Yerin beams and gushes about her boyfriend, completely forgetting about her unanswered question.

Wonwoo listens as best as she can, tries to remember the name of Yerin's boyfriend (Seung-something, who knows, who cares) and nods in what she hopes are appropriate times.

"So... how's Jihoon?"

"He's fine." Wonwoo says, fingers reaching up to play with the necklace around her neck instead. "He's been a great source of comfort recently. For my sister and I both."

"That's good to hear. I'm glad you have someone you can rely on."

_He can't give you what I can, can't give you what you want_, Mingyu says, _Only I can._

Yerin takes Wonwoo's hand, patting it and Wonwoo pulls back instantly, startling Yerin. "I'm sorry, I have to go to the bathroom."

Wonwoo hurries to the bathroom, locking herself in a stall.

_He doesn't know_, Mingyu continues, _He doesn't know even the most basic of your needs, he doesn't know you._

"Shut up," Wonwoo says through clenched teeth. She's pressing the heels of her palms into her eyes until she sees stars behind her eyelids.

"He doesn't know you." Wonwoo looks up at Mingyu, "He doesn't know you like _I_ do."

"What do you want?" Wonwoo says, pressing herself as far away from Mingyu as she can.

"I've been inside your head, Wonwoo." Mingyu says instead of answering, leaning back on the stall door, "_I_ truly know you. I know it _all_."

He looks sad when he says it and Wonwoo hates it. She hates it so much because it makes her eyes water and she feels her shoulders sag.

"You don't have to be alone anymore, you don't have to be burdened with the pain of it all." He continues, "All your hopes, anxieties, heartbreaks - they're mine now, too." 

"No, they're not."

"Oh, but they are. You're mine, aren't you?"

"No." Wonwoo snaps, "I am not."

"You are, though. Or, you will be. You'll be mine because - that symbol on your stomach? It marks you as mine. Once we seal our deal, nobody can lay a hand on you unless I say so. That necklace? A way for me to get to you much quicker."

Wonwoo reaches up to run her fingers over the necklace, playing with it as she looks down at the tiled floor. Not for the first time, regret climbs up her throat, makes her mouth taste bitter.

"I know you, Wonwoo. I know you, inside and out."

"I'm so tired." Wonwoo breathes out, the need to go home and rest settling deep into her bones, "I'm so, so _tired_."

"I know. Tired of all that rage, all that anger." Mingyu says. "But it's what keeps you going, isn't it?"

Wonwoo blinks, "Yeah. I have a sister to take care of, a brother to find."

Mingyu smiles down at her, gentle and kind, something Wonwoo hasn't seen on him. It makes the hair on the back of her neck stand on end, makes a shiver run down her spine.

"Then let's find him, let's take care of her. I'm here to help you."

Wonwoo nods, standing so she's face to face with Mingyu. "So what... do I need to do?"

"I need you to do everything I say. I want your loyalty, devotion, some sacrifices." Mingyu steps back and Wonwoo realizes they're not in the bathroom anymore. They're standing in the middle of a dark hallway, in front of an illuminated painting of a field of flowers, "And in return, I will do anything and everything you wish."

"What kind of sacrifices?"

"There are some things I will ask of you and when I do so, you _have_ to do them. Maybe some of the tasks will be considered sacrifices to you, maybe they won't be. But you have to follow through or it's all over."

"If you want that you cannot touch my siblings or Jihoon. The moment you do, it's all over."

Mingyu smiles at her, stepping closer to her and the painting.

"Okay." Wonwoo says, taking a step back for every step Mingyu takes forward. "I'm willing to give you all my loyalty. All my devotion. And make the necessary sacrifices."

Mingyu smiles wide. His eyes are black again and he's taller than Wonwoo remembers. He laughs, deep and joyful. "Wonderful! I knew you wouldn't let me down. And when the time comes - you'll make an excellent sin."

Wonwoo blinks, taking one more step back, "What do you mean?"

"You'll understand in time." He says, "But for now, let's seal _this_ deal."

"Okay. Okay." Wonwoo says, taking in deep breaths. "You'll help me get rid of - of _them_. And help me find Soonyoung."

"Yes, yes." Mingyu replies, waving a hand dismissively, "And in return, you'll give me all your loyalty, all your devotion, sacrifice what is needed."

"Seulgi, Soonyoung and Jihoon won't get hurt?"

"I will keep them from harm this point forward."

Wonwoo nods, wiping her sweaty palms on her pants. "Okay. What, do we shake hands? Do I sign a contract?"

Mingyu shakes his head, stepping close to undo the clasp of the necklace around her neck, "This for that, eye for an eye. Blood for blood."

Mingyu places the necklace into the palm of her hand, closing her fingers over it and then -

Mingyu turns to the painting next to her and reaches _into_ it. Wonwoo stares at where Mingyu's arm disappears, surprise making her eyes wide when Mingyu pulls out a small dagger. Wonwoo watches as Mingyu wraps his left hand around the blade, pulling slowly, blood dripping onto the floor.

Wonwoo clenches her own hand into a fist, watching as Mingyu extends his bloody hand to her.

"Come, sweetheart. It's time."

_No. I don't want to._

Wonwoo breathes out, stepping closer until Mingyu can grab her hand.

"Doesn't it hurt?" She asks, looking up at him. He looks content and Wonwoo wonders if he can feel, physically or emotionally. How long has he been the deadly sin of wrath? What did he do to deserve that title? Where are the others?

"Pain is temporary and I heal fast." Mingyu says, "Why complain when I'll heal in an hour?"

Wonwoo doesn't answer, only drops her gaze to her own palm where Mingyu has the tip of the dagger, pressing gently.

"Ready?"

And really, Wonwoo thinks, how funny is it to have wrath ask if you're ready for him to cut up your palm?

"No." Wonwoo answers, "But that doesn't matter."

Wonwoo doesn't scream when Mingyu cuts her hand so deep she can swear she can feel the blade scrape bone.

She only winces, breathing growing ragged and vision blurring.

Wonwoo cries out, fingers twitching in pain as Mingyu tangles them in his. Her blood mixes with Mingyu's, drips down their wrists, down their forearms, and onto the floor. He takes the necklace from Wonwoo's other hand, placing it between their torn up palms.

Mingyu whispers words Wonwoo doesn't understand, can't even dream to pronounce, words that rattle her ribcage and make her ears ring. Her head feels light and everything starts to tilt, faster and faster the more Mingyu whispers.

"I got you." He says, wrapping an arm around her waist when her knees buckle, "You'll be okay. Only one last thing."

Wonwoo can't find it in herself to push him away, can only sag in his arms and watch as the dark ceiling spins.

Wonwoo turns her head when everything stops spinning, watching as Mingyu brings her wrist to his mouth and licks it clean.

Wonwoo blinks, mouth going dry as Mingyu pushes her back and brings their hands close to her mouth.

"No." She says, "No, that's so - "

"It's the last thing." Wonwoo purses her lips, ready to refuse again. "I promise, it's not that bad."

Mingyu smiles and this time - Wonwoo doesn't feel afraid.

_Insane, insane, insane. You're insane!_

Wonwoo licks Mingyu's wrist clean. Her cheeks grow hot in shame and she feels like throwing up.

"Done!" Mingyu says when she pulls back, untangling their fingers, "See you after work."

Wonwoo blinks and she's staring at Yerin again.

"You look like hell." Yerin says, not unkindly, "What happened?"

Wonwoo reaches up to play with her necklace, "Just... couldn't sleep, that's all."

"Why? Nightmares?"

Wonwoo smiles, "Not really. But enough about that - is that a new ring?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!  
No, I did not abandon this.
> 
> I moved lol and I've been working, had no time to update I am so sorry! I have a few more chapters done and I've also done some edits on the first three chapters but I don't have enough time right now I am so sorry this will have to do I'll see you guys very soon I promise next Friday if I get lucky again
> 
> As always: I Love Praise So Please Leave A Comment About What You Think


	4. chapter four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I was waiting for you. Remember when I said I was going to drop by?"
> 
> "I wasn't coming home fast enough so you sent a demon after me?"
> 
> So he knows.

Wonwoo is sitting on the bus after work when Mingyu shows up.

He sits next to her. Wonwoo takes him in, blinking at his black button up and equally dark skinny jeans, eyes lingering on his now black hair. 

He looks normal. If anything maybe a little too much black, but other than that - _normal_.

Wonwoo looks around, sees everything in color, in motion, and everyone acting like there isn't a demon riding the bus.

"Can everyone...?" Wonwoo vaguely motions to her eyes, trying to ask if she'll look crazy, if everyone will see her talking to an empty seat next to her. 

"See me?" He asks, catching a woman's elbow as she stumbles, "Yeah. I'm here."

The woman thanks Mingyu, smiling at Wonwoo before shuffling away. Wonwoo wonders if it doesn't hurt where Mingyu caught her. Wonwoo can see the hand print wrapping around the woman's elbow, rapidly fading from yellow and green to purple and black.

Wonwoo turns to look at Mingyu, question on the tip of her tongue before she changes her mind. It's none of her business what Mingyu does. As long as he helps her find Soonyoung and doesn't hurt them or Jihoon.

Wonwoo looks around again, locking in on a group of teenagers who can't keep their eyes off of both of them.

"Children." Mingyu says when he notices where Wonwoo is staring at, canines flashing as he sends a smile to the group, making all of them blush and whisper among themselves, "How cute."

"Aren't you charming." Wonwoo says, looking at him through narrowed eyes. "It kinda pisses me off."

Mingyu laughs and Wonwoo hates it. The teenagers swoon even more, people turn their heads to stare at him, everyone seems to be looking at him with adoration and Wonwoo wants to scream.

She wants to scream at them that the man next to her is a demon, can't they see it?

_Stare a little too long and his teeth get sharper! _She wants to yell, _Unfocus a little and his eyes turn black. Look at him from the corner of your eyes and his figure grows and grows until it's all you can see._

"You know, we should probably go get your car."

"You read my mind." Wonwoo says, looking out the window, "I'll have to go pay Jeonghan a visit tomorrow."

"Why not today?"

"This route doesn't pass anywhere near Jeonghan's place." Wonwoo says when she turns to meet his gaze, "I'd have to take two more buses to get there."

"I can take you. All you have to do is ask."

"Then - take me to Jeonghan's house." Wonwoo says, clutching her necklace until her knuckles turn white, "Right now."

"That's not asking," Mingyu says, tilting his head, "But okay."

Mingyu reaches over to grab her wrist and Wonwoo is suddenly looking at Jeonghan's house. Her car is nowhere to be seen, not in the driveway or the curb.

Wonwoo twists her wrist out of Mingyu's grip, walking around him to Jeonghan's door. Mingyu doesn't speak, following her like a shadow.

Wonwoo stands outside for who knows how long. She doesn't want to step a foot into Jeonghan's house, just thinking about opening the door makes her skin crawl. 

"I want to find out who else was with him that night." Wonwoo says at last, staring at Jeonghan's door. "I want to kill them one by one." She turns to look at Mingyu, "I want Jeonghan for last."

Mingyu stares at Wonwoo, a smile slowly spreading across his face. "Lovely."

Mingyu steps closer, reaching behind Wonwoo to grab the doorknob and caging her between him and the door. Wonwoo can feel his breath hit her cheek, she can feel her heart beat faster and faster until she can't feel it anymore, but she doesn't move away.

She can't.

Mingyu twists the doorknob and swings the door open. Wonwoo steps back into Jeonghan's house, eyes locked on Mingyu. He doesn't have her caged in anymore, but he's standing in the doorway.

Wonwoo turns away, walking into the living room. She can't hear anything except her own heavy breathing and clumsy footsteps. Wonwoo decides to take a look around, going from room to room, turning things over while Mingyu trails after her, expressionless and quiet.

Wonwoo knows her purse is in Jeonghan's house somewhere. She woke up without it and she doesn't remember Jeonghan throwing it into the car when he took her to the park. She needs her purse. She needs to find it.

Maybe he kept it in his bedroom, maybe left it in the basement but Wonwoo doesn't want to go down there.

"When is he getting home?" Wonwoo murmurs to herself, sitting down on Jeonghan's bed. Things would be easier if he was home. Then he'd just give Wonwoo her things.

"Maybe he knows you're here." Mingyu says after Wonwoo starts looking through Jeonghan's closet. Wonwoo pauses, looking over her shoulder at Mingyu. "Maybe he's waiting you out."

"Well, he has to come home at some point."

"So, what. You're going to wait for him to get here?"

"_You_ could wait. Then you'd get me and bring me here to talk to him." Wonwoo shrugs, looking up at a box on a shelf in the closet. She tries to bring it down, but it doesn't budge. "Help me bring this down."

"Please."

"What? Just bring it down." Wonwoo steps away from the closet, giving Mingyu room to reach up and grab the box.

"Instead of waiting," Mingyu says, setting the box down on Jeonghan's bed. "I could just go get him." 

Wonwoo creeps closer, not replying to Mingyu's suggestion.

The box is medium sized, wooden. There's carvings on the side that Wonwoo can't quite focus on, that make her eyes water from the effort of trying to focus again and again. Wonwoo runs her hands over it, trying to find a latch, a crevice, _something_ to open it but she finds nothing.

"Can you..." Wonwoo says to Mingyu, motioning to the box, "Open it?"

"You need blood to open it." Mingyu is across from her, _lounging_ on Jeonghan's bed. He looks bored, eyes half lidded as he stares at the box.

"Of course it does." Wonwoo sighs. She reaches into her bag and pulls out a nail clipper, holding it against her fingertip. "I should carry a switchblade with me or something."

Mingyu raises an eyebrow at her, "A switchblade?"

"Well. Yeah. Could've helped me a few days ago - could've helped me now."

"Had it helped you a few days ago you wouldn't have me."

"I'd be better wouldn't I be? I wouldn't be damned, he'd be dead, they'd all be dead - "

"Wait a minute - damned?" Mingyu asks, leaning forward to watch Wonwoo smear her blood on the box. "_Damned_, sweetheart? I don't think so."

The box gives a squeak and the top swings open.

"How so?" Asks Wonwoo, staring at Mingyu. "Aren't I to be loyal and devoted to you? I'll have to give you my all. For all I know _you'll_ be the end of me. And do you really think I'll be able to go to heaven once I die?"

Mingyu smiles, grabbing her hand and kissing the tip of her index finger. Wonwoo watches as the cut on her fingertip closes and leaves smooth skin behind.

"Oh, sweetheart. You're one of the lucky few who managed to contact one of _Wrath's_ sins. Most don't do it with enough passion, enough belief, with the wrong sin at lead. You, sweetheart, you called me with _more_ than enough passion, _more_ than enough belief that you can have anything, anyone."

Mingyu shuffles closer, pushing the box aside until it's on the other side of the bed where it won't get in the way between him and her. He tangles their fingers together and comes close enough that Wonwoo can see her silhouette in his eyes.

"You will never have an end, if I have anything to say about it. You are not damned, you just have a new path laid out before you. A path were you will be whispered about with respect, worshipped as a goddess. You and I will rule over this world and the next."

Mingyu tilts his head and leans even closer. Wonwoo stares over his shoulder, not meeting his eyes as he whispers against her cheek, "You, my dear, are not damned. Far from it."

"Well, it doesn't feel like it." She says, pulling away. She's shaking all over, can barely stay on her feet as she rounds the bed to stand in front of the box. "Alright. Okay. Let's see what's in here."

Mingyu laughs as Wonwoo pulls back a thin black cloth covering the contents inside the box.

At the very top Wonwoo sees a baggie with her name, her jewellery inside. Wonwoo takes out the bag, setting it aside and pulling out other baggies that rest underneath hers.

Each baggie has a date and a name. There's earrings, bracelets, rings, pens, makeup, strips of cloth, hair clips - anything and everything inside the baggies.

_There were more. More, more, more. Not just you, more people who cried, who died, who were never found, who never saw their families again. There were more._

Wonwoo pulls the baggies out with shaky hands and a tight feeling in her chest. Who knows how many of them suffered like she did, how many of them cried and yelled, how many got their tongues cut off but never grew them back, how many weren't lucky.

_If anyone deserves to die it's him. Him and the others. Get rid of them. Get rid of them, get rid if them, make them pay for what they did, make them PAY -_

"Bring him to me." Wonwoo says through clenched teeth, "Bring him to me _now_."

Mingyu smiles, "Of course."

Wonwoo blinks and he's gone. Wonwoo takes deep breaths to calm down. She tries to recognize any names on the baggies but none of them ring a bell.

Underneath the baggies, Wonwoo finds journals. New and worn, all sizes and colors.

Wonwoo takes them out, flipping through each of them. They remind Wonwoo of the books Soonyoung has. They come in various languages and the ones Wonwoo can understand only talk about the beginning of the universe.

There's a thin journal at the very bottom of the chest. Its color a creamy white like the thick pages it has, drawings of a man dressed in flowers inside. He stands tall and serene and Wonwoo thinks of the woman cloaked in stars.

Could Jeonghan have his own sin?

Wonwoo puts the journal back inside the box and replaces the cloth, bringing down the lid.

The box doesn't go back to it's smooth design, the lid easily recognizable from the rest of the box.

She will take the box, Wonwoo decides. Even if Jeonghan refuses.

Wonwoo is looking through her baggie when Mingyu returns with Jeonghan. Mingyu drops him in front of where Wonwoo is sitting on the bed.

"Jeonghan!" Wonwoo says, sliding one of her rings onto her middle finger, "What took you so long? I thought you'd never show up."

"What is going on?" Jeonghan asks, trying to stand from where he kneels. Mingyu puts a hand on his shoulder and pushes him down so he stays kneeling.

"I was waiting for you." Wonwoo says, blinking at him innocently, "Remember when I said I was going to drop by?"

"I wasn't coming home fast enough so you sent a demon after me?"

So he knows.

"Well, I don't have all day." Wonwoo says, "You see, Jeonghan, I can't keep riding the bus everywhere. I need my purse. My keys are in there."

Wonwoo pats the box next to her.

"I already looked through your neat box and I found my jewellery, but... no purse. And I didn't see my car in your driveway." Wonwoo shrugs, "I just want compliance from you, Jeonghan."

Mingyu laughs behind Jeonghan, making him flinch.

"You know," Wonwoo says, tilting her head and furrowing her brows in mock concern, "For someone with a sin, you sure are a coward."

"I don't have Sin." Jeonghan says, voice cracking, "I just do rituals. I don't have a Sin."

"Rituals that deal with human sacrifices means that you have a Sin." Mingyu says, "If you just did rituals, you'd have lesser things. Not a chest that belongs to Envy."

"Envy." Wonwoo says, tilting her head in thought. Not entirely unsurprising and a bit unexpected, "Here's what's going to happen: I ask you something, you answer. I don't like your answer and I break your face."

Jeonghan is pale, but his eyes are burning with an intensity that make Wonwoo bristle.

_Make his pretty nose bleed, make him hurt until he cries, make him hurt like you did, dig your fingers into his eyes and pull his eyes out, crack his skull open, hear him scream, make him **HURT**_ \- 

"Tell me: what did I do to deserve the _honor_ of being chosen as a sacrifice?"

"Because of what you have." Jeonghan says with enough venom to make Wonwoo frown in confusion. "You have all that you need yet you act like your life is hard."

"You tried to kill me just because you think I'm, what, privileged?" Wonwoo says, then she places a hand on the chest next to her, "What kind of sick fuck - "

"I got all I have by being a sick fuck." Jeonghan spits, "Not all of us were born into a wealthy family, not all of us were born with a mother loaded enough to never worry about a thing. Thanks to all I've done my parents have a house, I have a house, my siblings can go to school without a problem. Thanks to all I do they don't have to suffer."

Jeonghan is breathing heavily, blinking back angry tears as he glares at Wonwoo. "We get by well enough, and that's all I wanted. I stopped for a while. The sacrifices, they stopped. All I did was pray but then I realized - I can have more. I can give more. So I thought, 'I'm already damned, aren't I? Might as well.'"

"You're fucked. Damned. More than I am." Wonwoo says, cupping his jaw and stroking his cheekbone with her thumb, "Envy doesn't suit you. Maybe you should've called Greed."

Jeonghan doesn't reply, glaring from where he kneels.

"Where is my purse, Jeonghan?"

"In the garage. With your car."

"Mingyu. Get my purse. And take the box with you."

Mingyu sighs, stepping away from Jeonghan and carrying the box away even when Jeonghan tries to stop him. Wonwoo wants to snap at him because she knows Mingyu could do the task faster than she can blink, yet he takes his time in leaving the room.

"Where are you going with that? That's mine!"

Wonwoo roughly buries her left hand into Jeonghan's hair when he tries to get up, anchoring him in place. She twists her fingers in his hair as best as she can so that he can't move without feeling pain.

"Now - what you're going to do is," Wonwoo says, pulling Jeonghan's hair until he looks at her, "You're going to tell me the names of the others who were in the basement with us."

"Why?"

"Because I want to have a chat with them too."

Jeonghan doesn't reply and Wonwoo pulls his hair so his neck is resting at an uncomfortable angle. Jeonghan whimpers and puts a hand behind him so he doesn't lose his balance and fall back on the floor.

"What's his name, Jeonghan?"

Wonwoo strikes Jeonghan across the face when he only glares at her. She feels satisfaction when Jeonghan can't turn his head because she still has him by the hair. Her palm tingles and her heart races when Jeonghan's skin begins to bloom red.

"What is wrong - "

"What is _his_ _name_, Jeonghan?"

"Fuck you."

Wonwoo brings back her hand and Jeonghan flinches, putting his free hand in front of his face.

"Okay! Okay. I'll tell you." 

"Who is he?"

Jeonghan tells her. Name, age, address and all.

Wonwoo feels a chill run down her spine and she thinks: _Oh, Yerin. __She's so happy with him, she doesn't have a clue, he touches her knowing how filthy he is, does he have no shame? It doesn't matter, you need to **kill** him, make him **hurt**, get **rid** of him._

"Do you know how to translate those journals?"

"No."

"Of course he does." Mingyu says from the doorway, Wonwoo's purse hanging on his shoulder. "Why else would he have them?"

How long has he been there?

"Just get your demon to translate them and leave me the fuck alone."

Just for that, Wonwoo strikes him across the face again.

And Wonwoo likes the feeling of her palm tingling, likes the way Jeonghan's eyes water.

She likes the way her knuckles ache, likes the way her rings catch the skin over the high of his cheekbone and leave tiny droplets of blood behind.

Wonwoo leaves Jeonghan's house with names and addresses she didn't have before.

Wonwoo leaves Jeonghan's house with red knuckles and leaves Jeonghan splayed out on his bedroom floor, skin smarting and bleeding.

Wonwoo leaves Jeonghan's house but not before telling him, "I want you around me at all times from now on, do you understand? I'll pick you up tomorrow."

-

On her way home, Wonwoo's phone rings.

_Mom_.

Wonwoo doesn't answer until she has four missed calls, until the fifth one is coming through and she's parked in front of her apartment building.

Mingyu stares at her, elbow on the arm rest, chin on the palm of his hand.

_Too close._

Wonwoo fiddles with her necklace and accepts the call.

_"Where is she?"_

"Hello, Mom. How was your day?"

_"You had your weekend like you almost always do, where is she?"_

"Have you eaten yet?"

_"Don't make me go over there, Wonwoo."_

Wonwoo freezes in her seat. Mingyu pries her fingers from her necklace and runs his fingers over the indents on her palm. Her necklaces settles back on her collarbones, warmer than Wonwoo thought it would be. "It's okay." He says softly.

_"Bring her home, **now**. First, She takes Soonyoung and now you want to take my baby girl? I will not allow it."_

Mingyu leans forward to catch her gaze. "I'm here now." He whispers.

Wonwoo takes in a deep breath and hisses out, "Oh, like you take such good care of her."

_"Bring her - "_

"She fucking _hates_ you. She's scared of you, like Soonyoung and I were." Wonwoo almost shouts, eyes burning and free hand clutching onto Mingyu's like it's the only thing keeping her sane. "We spent so much time making sure you were good enough for her and one things goes wrong after years and you crumble like - like - "

_"Don't talk to me like that!"_ Her mother screeches, _"Bring her home or I'll make sure you never see her again."_

"I'll have to get rid of you." Wonwoo sobs, "I'll have to kill you. Please don't make me do it."

_"What?"_

"I love you."

_"You stupid - !"_

"I love you, Mommy."

_"I regret giving birth to you. You were always my one mistake in life."_

"She's staying with me now. If you get in my way, I'll get rid of you."

Wonwoo hangs up, pulling her hand away from Mingyu's and crying, phone forgotten as it tumbles to the floor.

She cries and cries and cries. She cries and she leans into the hand stroking her hair and doesn't complain when Mingyu rounds the car and opens her door to hug her.

She cries and ignores the way her skin crawls and the way her lungs seem to constrict with no sign of loosening up, ignores the way something in the back of her mind screams and screams with fear until something heavy and dark and warm smoothers it.

She stops crying, heavy limbed and hollow. Her face is pressed against the side of Mingyu's neck, skin sticky and warm.

Wonwoo pulls away, pushing him back so Mingyu stands and looks down at her.

"I don't want to kill her." Wonwoo says, bottom lip trembling, "I don't want to."

"I know."

"But I will."

"I know."

Mingyu tangles his fingers with hers and Wonwoo doesn't fight it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm only going to say this one (1) time, from the bottom of my heart, I'm gonna bear my soul for all of you to see. Here it goes:
> 
> FUCK schedules.
> 
> Also, I'm a liar, I don't have more chapters ready. I might just change everything. I was gonna kill Jeonghan off but now........
> 
> Also, I'm gonna swap chapter one and two so this whole mess makes a little more sense. I don't know when I will tho. So.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you guys liked this chapter I'll work as hard as I can to bring chapter six to you guys way sooner than I brought you chapter five.
> 
> As always I Am A Sucker For Praise or w/e so pls leave a comment :(


	5. chapter five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Are you ashamed of me?"
> 
> "Yes."

_It's cold._

_Wonwoo can hear thunder, rumbling low in the distance and she wants to go to it. She begins to pant, legs aching as she runs towards what she's not supposed to have. She feels warm. Her fingers run across steel and she can hear fire crackling._

_She feels so warm._

_Wonwoo opens her eyes and _sees.

-

Wonwoo picks up Jeonghan bright and early, not a single scratch on his face and her knuckles bruises free.

"I thought you didn't have a sin." She says, showing him her hand, "Yet here you are. Your face as pretty as ever."

Jeonghan doesn't reply. Wonwoo doesn't care.

When Wonwoo walks into work it's with Jeonghan at her heels and a smile on her face.

"Be good. See you at lunch." Wonwoo says, hand wrapping around Jeonghan's wrist. Jeonghan meets her gaze, resentment so clear in his eyes it makes Wonwoo smile.

People look confused and Jeonghan doesn't explain anything when they ask, barely even looks at them when they walk up to him.

And that's her whole day. Jeonghan stuck to her side when he's not working and her talking enough for both of them. Jihoon looks surprised when he sees her at lunch and Jeonghan is next to her, frowning when he realizes Jeonghan doesn't really reply to her chatter, even more so when Jeonghan climbs into her car after work.

And so it goes for a few days.

Pick up Jeonghan, make him stick around, drop him off after work.

"Since when are you guys best friends?" Jihoon asks on Saturday, sifting through puzzle pieces next to Seulgi. "All week he's been stuck to your side."

"Don't be jealous, 'hoon, you know I only have eyes for you." Wonwoo coos from the kitchen, laughing when Jihoon goes red and rolls his eyes. Her sister is smiling, a gleam in her eye that makes Wonwoo feel warm.

They eat, they joke, and if it weren't for Soonyoung missing Wonwoo would've felt complete.

Mingyu visits her during the nights.

Mostly she stays as far away from him as she can, on the other side of the room. The first two days he had been quiet and calm, but he'd begun acting irritated after that.

"It's been a week."

"I know."

"You have the names, the addresses - when are we going to do something?" He says, pacing at the foot of her bed. The more he paces the more Wonwoo feels her skin itch. Her chin is propped up on her knees, fingers twitching against her necklace. She's pressed against the headboard of her bed, sheets pulled over her shoulders.

"I need to plan things out. If I get caught, who will take care of Seulgi? It's not that simple."

Mingyu crawls onto her bed, startling Wonwoo. She presses herself against the headboard further, muscles locking up when Mingyu rests his forehead on her knees.

"But it can be. I'm _here_." Mingyu says, echoing in the room, "Nothing will go wrong."

Wonwoo doesn't reply, skin crawling when Mingyu looks up at her. His eyes are pleading, wide and shiny, "You can rely on me. I'm _here_. You can trust me."

_Nonono. I can't. I **can't**._

"You can!" He insists, "They hurt you so _bad_."

Wonwoo breathes in sharply at the way Mingyu's eyes darken.

"They _hurt_ you, they hurt _you_." Mingyu repeats, pulling away only to lean closer to Wonwoo's face. His breath hits Wonwoo's cheekbone, warm and soft, "Don't you want to make them hurt too? Make them pay for what they did to you? I want to see you kill them, watch as you reduce them to nothing, make them cry and scream, dig your nails into their skin and _pull_."

Wonwoo's vision is blurry, but not because of tears, wheezing breaths leaving through parted lips. Wonwoo is trembling all over, teeth chattering from the cold she feels even if sweat rolls down her back.

"Get - get awa - get away." Wonwoo stutters out, hand closing around her necklace _tight_.

Mingyu turns his head and presses a kiss to corner of her mouth.

Wonwoo scrambles away, landing on the floor.

She crawls back and back, hitting her closet door, eyes never leaving Mingyu.

"Wonwoo?"

Wonwoo snaps her head to the door, sees Seulgi standing there, and turns again to look at Mingyu but he's not on her bed anymore.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Wonwoo croaks out, wiping the sweat from her face, "Yeah. Just a nightmare."

Seulgi frowns, coming to kneel next to her.

"Me too."

"Yeah?" Wonwoo asks, clearing her throat, "What about?"

Seulgi stays quiet for a moment and when she speaks her voice is small, "Mom comes to take me back."

"Hey." Wonwoo says softly, pulling Seulgi in for a hug. "You're here to stay. She won't take you, okay? I already talked to her about this."

"I dreamed with Soonyoung, too. He was - was. Um."

"Hey," Wonwoo says into Seulgi's hair, pressing a kiss to her head, where it will sink into her skin and let Seulgi know peace of mind, "Soonyoung is okay. He's fine. He's out there. He just needs some time to come back."

"Okay." Seulgi says, sniffling. "Okay."

Wonwoo hugs her harder and tries not to look at Mingyu standing in the corner of her room.

-

Wonwoo has one of Soonyoung's book in hand. One that's a deep shade of blue and, mostly, in English.

It mostly has diagrams and recipes, prayers and rituals, like the white journal she took from Jeonghan and the other one, a purple one, Soonyoung left behind. When Wonwoo flips through the pages, she stops on the diagram she knows she drew before Jeonghan threw her into the river.

It's a small circle, a crescent moon below it as if it's cradling it. There's a total of seven tally marks underneath the crescent. There's a prayer which has to be said out loud for the diagram to work.

Wonwoo wonders why the diagram worked if she didn't say the prayer.

Wonwoo flips the page and stops on a picture she's seen before.

It's a picture of a man with a crown of fire that makes Wonwoo trace the lines with her fingertips over and over again, shoulders tense and eyebrows furrowed.

She remembers - she _remembers -_

_Shoulders outlined against a faint blue light, a black frame and thunder, lightning, the need to breathe, the need to consume, the need to dig her hands into an endless pit and pull out it's heart and **eat**._

Wonwoo is startled when the doorbell rings, almost letting the book drop. It can't be her mom because she has keys, it can't be her sister or Jihoon because she told them where she would be after work and they didn't want to step foot in the house.

Wonwoo gets up from the couch, book in hand, to answer the door.

"You don't need to knock." Wonwoo says, not moving aside to let Mingyu in. "You can be anywhere you want to be, can't you?"

Mingyu smiles, "Hello to you too, sweetheart."

Wonwoo steps aside, "I need to take all these books with me. I want Jeonghan to translate them."

"He's in here?" Mingyu asks.

"No. He's at - at my house."

"You trust him to behave himself?" Mingyu asks, trailing after her.

_No. I don't._ Wonwoo thinks to herself, but the way his eyes had softened when Seulgi had introduced herself -

Wonwoo thinks back to the picture on his desk, thinks about the pretty girl in purple next to him and his mother.

Did he think about her when he saw Seulgi?

"No."

Mingyu stares at her, "We'll have to kill him."

"I know." Wonwoo says, piling books on the coffee table. They're not too heavy, but why carry them when you have a demon to carry them for you?

"You've only had him one week."

"I know." Wonwoo grits out, "I know, okay? And it's not like he's alone with my sister. Jihoon is there too."

Mingyu rolls his eyes and Wonwoo ignores it, pointing to the books on the table, "Take these to my car while I pack the rest of Seulgi's clothes."

"Please."

"What?" Wonwoo says, face screwed up in irritation while Mingyu grabs a stack of books. "Just take them, the car's unlocked."

Mingyu leaves without a word.

Wonwoo climbs the stairs, leaves the blue book on Seulgi's nightstand and begins packing as much of her clothes as possible. She doesn't bother with folding, only shoving things into a duffle bag used for sleepovers. The sooner she leaves, the better.

Wonwoo doesn't hear her mother entering the house, doesn't even hear her climb up the stairs.

She's zipping the bag up when she hears the door creak open. Wonwoo turns around only for her head to snap to the side when her mother slaps her.

Wonwoo straightens, blinking at her mother while her hand cradles the left side of her face.

Her mother pulls back, taking a couple of steps back, eyes furious and mouth twisted into a scowl. She looks like she's waiting for something. Wonwoo feels her stomach cramp up with uneasiness.

Maybe she wants Wonwoo to lose her mind and attack her. Then she'd be able to take Seulgi away.

_Where's Mingyu?_

"Mom?" Wonwoo says, breathing in deep through her nose. She's trying hard not to lose her temper.

_Soonyoung will disapprove, she's your mother, he'll be so mad when Mom goes and cries to him, he'll be so disappointed._

"I won't allow you to take my baby from me, do you understand?" She says, slowly, like Wonwoo is eight again and she wants to explore the woods behind their house and she has to explain that the woods are unsafe for Soonyoung. And her too.

Wonwoo feels her body go rigid.

"We talked about this." Wonwoo says just as slowly, like she's sixteen again and she's telling her mother six year old Seulgi needs friends, "Seulgi is staying with me now. It's what's best for her."

_Where is he?_

"I won't let you."

Wonwoo doesn't have time to react before her mother is charging at her, sending them both to the ground. Wonwoo feels the air leave her lungs as her mother puts all her weight on Wonwoo's stomach.

Wonwoo tries to push her mother off, body jerking when her mother twists her fist harshly against her stomach. Wonwoo looks down at her stomach, eyes widening when she registers the hilt of a knife in her mother's hand. Blood is staining her shirt.

_Where is he?_

The next thing her mind registers is the pain, a yell ripping out of her throat, white hot flashes making her hair stand on end and all -

(All she sees is tree tops outlined against the black sky, she's so cold, the concrete scrapes against her skin, all she can taste is blood, she can't talk, can barely breathe, why did they do this to her, what did she do to deserve all this pain?)

_Where is he?_

Wonwoo yells out again, pushing her mother away, knife still in her stomach. There's blood rushing in her ears and everything is blurry and she feels so cold -

(The water is so cold, the sky turns grey and then she hears nothing but water until she claws her way out of the river. Her legs don't work and she tries to hang onto one tree to get up but she can't.)

_Where is he?_

Her mother doesn't have time to move before Wonwoo is on her, pulling the knife out of her stomach with a pained grunt before she brings the knife down on her mother's chest, hard.

Her mother stares, mouth agape and Wonwoo feels - she _feels_ -

A rage so endless and so old, so dark and cold, lonely and sorrowful.

She pulls the knife out of her mother's chest and brings the knife down again.

And again.

And again.

Wonwoo feels lightheaded, arm not coming down hard enough and only serving to make her angrier. She wants her mother to _hurt_, wants her to hurt like she's been hurting for days, weeks, months, years.

Wonwoo doesn't stop stabbing her mother until her own stomach starts to hurt bad enough she can't breathe right.

_Where is he?_

Wonwoo collapses on the floor next to her mother's still body.

Wonwoo feels so cold and sticky and so, so tired. She barely has energy to lift her hand and run her fingers over the necklace against her throat. It's strangely comforting with how warm it is against her skin.

"My goodness, you look terrible."

Wonwoo doesn't turn to look at Mingyu.

"Deja vu." She says, eyes burning as she stares at the ceiling, thinking about what she did, "Help me."

"Please."

"_Please_." Wonwoo echoes softly, closing her eyes. Mingyu kneels next to her, cooing sympathetically as he pulls her shirt up to look at the wound. "I didn't want to."

"I know."

"I told her and she didn't listen and I didn't want to but I _warned_ her."

"You did, didn't you?"

"I did." Wonwoo sniffles, blinking her eyes open. Hot tears run down the sides of her face and even if Mingyu's voice is sympathetic, his face is indifferent and it only makes Wonwoo's tears come faster. "Where were you?"

"I thought I could let you handle this one. And I wasn't wrong." Mingyu says as he places his hand over her wound. "Now, this will hurt."

It's the only warning she gets before Mingyu's fingers dig into the wound. Wonwoo grits her teeth, head knocking back on the floor painfully. Wonwoo grips Mingyu's wrist, vision swimming as pain spreads through her. Sweat beads at her temple and she barely has time to turn her head before she vomits black gunk on the floor.

Mingyu doesn't say anything, silent as she sits up and glares at him. Wonwoo brings her hand back and tries to hit him, but Mingyu grabs her wrist before her fist can come into contact with his face. Mingyu grips her wrist hard enough that Wonwoo knows she'll have bruises.

"Piece of shit demon." Wonwoo says, wiping her mouth with the inside of her shirt, "_Where were you?_"

Wonwoo presses the heel of her hand into her left eye until she sees colors, her limbs trembling as she stares at her mother's body. She wipes her eyes furiously with her hand.

"Where were you? I thought I was gonna die. Why didn't you tell me she came into the house? Look at what I did, Soonyoung is going to be so upset, what will I tell _Seulgi?_" Wonwoo says, hiccuping as she tries to breathe properly, "Where were you? You said I could count on you."

"Hey, hey." Mingyu says, cupping her face with his hands and stroking her cheekbones with his thumbs. Her hands fall to her lap limply and Wonwoo sees the purple around her wrist. His skin feels rough yet smooth at the same time, cool fingers pressed against her warm and sticky skin. "I'm here, aren't I?"

"Yeah, but - "

"I healed you, didn't I?"

"Yeah."

"I'm going to help you clean up."

"Okay."

Mingyu helps Wonwoo up, handing her a shirt and turning around before Wonwoo can even ask him to. Wonwoo wipes her skin clean as best as she can with her dirty shirt, pulling the clean one over her head.

There's blood pooling on the floor and the knife is still shoved into her chest.

_What will I tell Soonyoung? And Seulgi? How will I get rid of the blood stains on the floor? Will her work place alert the authorities when she stops showing up? Will they know I killed her? Will I go to jail? Who will take care of Seulgi?_

"Oh, God." Wonwoo whispers to herself.

"Don't worry, sweetheart. I'm here." Mingyu says, next to her, looking down at her mother's body before turning to look her with a soft smile. "I'm right here."

And she shouldn't sigh with relief but she does.

Mingyu burns the body.

Wonwoo stares as he dips his fingertips on the blood on the floor, crouching over her mother's body as he paints on her stomach with it. He whispers, hisses, and Wonwoo remembers when they were in the dark hallway. Mingyu lays Wonwoo's bloody shirt on her mother's lap and steps back to stand next to Wonwoo.

"Watch." He says with a smile.

Her mother's skin begins to bubble, giving in as she starts to melt. The smell of burning flesh and hair and bones makes Wonwoo gag, eyes watering so much she has to step out of the room. She stumbles to the bathroom, throwing up again in the toilet.

When she goes back to the room the only thing left is a pile of ashes. The bedroom window is opened, curtains pulled back and a slight breeze pushes in. The chilly air smells crisp, no trace of the awful burning smell left.

Wonwoo pulls the sleeves of the shirt over her hands, watching Mingyu sweep the ashes into a dust pan.

"I'm going to teach you how to do that. Next time." Mingyu says, gesturing to the left over ashes on the floor.

"I can do that?"

"Yes. You just need a blessing of sort from me. It's a diagram and a prayer. Simple stuff. And convenient." Mingyu says as he leaves the room. Wonwoo trails after him into the bathroom, where he dumps the dust into the toilet, "No blood stained floor, no blood stained shirt, no body at all."

Mingyu brushes past her and Wonwoo follows.

Mingyu pinches ash between his thumb and pointer finger, skin going white as he squeezes and rolls the dust between his fingers. He blows the left over dust from his skin, standing up and placing a small glass bead in her palm.

"You need to eat that." Mingyu says, leaving her to sweep the remaining dust from the floor. "If you want to be able to do what I just did."

Mingyu walks out of the room and Wonwoo stares at the glass bead in her hand, rolls it around thoughtfully before popping it into her mouth.

_Spit it out, out, out! Take it out!_

Wonwoo rolls the bead in her mouth, feeling it fall beneath her tongue.

Wonwoo startles when she feels Mingyu's hands land on her shoulders, hissing strange words again. His grip is uncomfortable, unrelenting when Wonwoo tries to pull away.

Mingyu's hands slide against her throat and Wonwoo claws at them, trying to pull away with more desperation, but Mingyu pulls her suffocatingly close, his body flush with hers. Wonwoo feels herself break out into a cold sweat, feels the glass bead underneath her tongue and considers spitting it out.

She doesn't want the damned ability if it means that Mingyu will behave like this.

"Eat it. Swallow it." Mingyu whispers into her ear, clamping a hand over her mouth.

Wonwoo swallows the bead down. It burns all the way down: throat on fire, tongue numb, and stomach churning painfully.

Mingyu lets her go and she clings onto his arm so she doesn't fall on her knees.

"I hate you so much." She rasps out, pulling away from him, "I hate you so fucking much."

She waves a hand at the room, clinging onto the doorway for balance. The world spins and she can't see very well. Her heart drumming in her ears, head throbbing, limbs shaking and sweat clinging onto her skin.

"Clean everything up. Bleach everything down, close the windows, make sure the bathroom is bleached down too, make sure nobody can tell she's stepped foot in the house. Destroy the knife. I'll be in the car. Bring Seulgi's clothes with you when you're done."

Wonwoo stumbles all the way to her car, shaking in her seat until Mingyu climbs in forty minutes later. Wonwoo feels at ease when he looks at her even if she had been upset because of him. Knowing he was out of the house and that so was she made her shoulders untense.

"Is today the day I finally get to meet your family?"

"No." Wonwoo says when she starts the car.

"Shame."

Wonwoo will never let Seulgi or Jihoon or Soonyoung know about Mingyu. Never. She will hide him as long as she can, forever if possible.

Wonwoo pulls out of the driveway, 

"Are you ashamed of me?" Mingyu asks, tapping on the arm rest. Wonwoo's grip on the steering wheel tightens. Being so close to hin makes Wonwoo nauseous, unnerved with the way he stares.

"Yes." Wonwoo says at last, turning to look at him when she stops at a red light. "I don't want Seulgi or Soonyoung or Jihoon to know about you. You were a moment of weakness, a moment that lead to damnation."

Mingyu stares back at Wonwoo with a neutral face.

"I am priceless. You have no idea how lucky you are to have a sin. I will take you to great heights Wonwoo, heights that you would never imagine, I will give you everything and anything you want and then - then you will realize you can't live without me. And you won't want to either."

The light turns green and Wonwoo looks away, driving home without another word.

-

Wonwoo, Jihoon thinks, seems different from before.

She walks around the office with more confidence than she's had, like nothing can touch her. Almost as if she _knows_, as if she _has_.

Knows and has _what_, Jihoon doesn't know.

Jihoon just knows that Jeonghan twitches when Wonwoo looks at him, flinches and tenses when she passes by. He mutters to himself, looks small when he had previously been the one walking around with confidence.

It's as if Wonwoo had sucked those things out of Jeonghan.

He remembers when he met Wonwoo, a thin and delicate thing with dark hair and darker eyes.

"Hi! My name is Jihoon." He had said, hands clenching his shirt nervously, "We're neighbors."

"I know." She replied, not unkind, "I'm Wonwoo."

"Wanna play, Wonwoo? I've never had neighbors my age."

Wonwoo smoothed out her skirt, looking over her shoulder to her mother before turning back to Jihoon.

"_Yes_." She had said it with such desperation that Jihoon had been taken aback. "Wait - let me go get my brother. go to your backyard. Wait for me."

Before Jihoon could say anything else, Wonwoo had taken off, slowing down to a walk when her mother turned around to watch them with hard eyes.

Jihoon had waved goodbye, running to his backyard - a little confused, a whole lot excited.

Wonwoo eventually came outside, shorts on instead of skirt with a boy by her side. A small bag hung on her back - the boy had one too. Jihoon felt oddly left out.

There he stood, on the other side of the chain link fence, without a bag.

"This is my brother. His name's Soonyoung." Wonwoo said.

Jihoon blinked, "Hi! I'm Jihoon."

Soonyoung smiled in return, "Hi! Let's go."

Jihoon watched as they begun to climb over the fence.

"What are you doing?"

"Leaving?" Soonyoung said from the top of the fence, "Mom won't let us leave, we have to sneak around like ninjas."

He made a chopping motion with his hand, nose wrinkling.

Jihoon scoffed, "Just tell her you're coming over to my house."

"She won't let us." Wonwoo rolled her eyes, taking off her bag and tossing it to her brother. "If she did we wouldn't sneak out."

Jihoon scoffed but didn't stop them from climbing the fence. "If you guys get in trouble it's not my fault."

They spent a whole half hour playing in Jihoon's backyard before the siblings had the idea of going exploring in the woods behind their houses.

Jihoon readily agreed.

When his mother found him three hours later, deep in the woods - when she had scolded him for going into the woods unsupervised and grounded him for two weeks after getting caught - Jihoon realized trouble would follow the siblings wherever they went.

After the sibling's own scolding and punishment didn't stop them from sneaking around, climbing into his bedroom through the window at the young age of eight - Jihoon realized they were there to stay, squirming around until they found gaps in his life and filled them in.

"You seem different." Jihoon tells Wonwoo, chin on the palm of his hand. Wonwoo is staring at Seulgi as she fusses over her clothes in the living room. Jihoon didn't question the black and oversized long sleeved shirt Wonwoo came back in, different from the blue button up she had been wearing earlier.

He didn't question it like he didn't question the stack of books on the dinner table, didn't question Jeonghan flipping through them and taking notes on a blank notebook.

He didn't question it but he would, at some point, and Wonwoo knew it too, if the way she avoided his gaze said anything.

"Bad different?" Wonwoo asks without looking at him, "or good different?"

"I don't know. It's like you know something... something you probably shouldn't."

Wonwoo's face goes eerily blank and, for a second, Jihoon worries that he's made her mad but Wonwoo turns to look at him with hard, _sad_ eyes.

"What if I do?" She asks, "What if I know something nobody else does?"

Jihoon frowns. "Do you?"

"Maybe." She shrugs, "Maybe not. Would you like to know?"

The way she asks isn't malicious, but something about the tone of her voice makes it seem like finding out isn't free.

Jihoon doesn't answer - he doesn't think he has the price to pay yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to thank the following songs, artists, and albums for helping me finish this chapter:
> 
> The entirety of the Eat Me, Drink Me album by Marilyn Manson  
Pienso En Tu Mira - Rosalia  
Malamente - Rosalia  
Doja Cat  
Maldito Duende - Heroes del Silencio  
Mujer Amante - Rata Blanca  
Ohio - King Princess
> 
> no i am not dead this chapter was just an absolute bitch to write s i g h  
im not fully satisfied with this chapter but then again im not fully satisfied with any of the others so.
> 
> sidenote: did some editing to the previous chapters. chapter one and two have been combined (and are now chapter one of this work) and three (now two) thru five (now four) had some editing done to them if you want to check that out.
> 
> please please please recommend me some songs, songs hugely influence my motivation and my creativity and i havent had any new songs in a while. it would really help out if any of you left songs for me.
> 
> as always: I Love Praise So Please Leave A Comment
> 
> see you in the next chapter!


	6. chapter six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Try that again and I'll make sure you rot in jail. I'll get rid of you." Wonwoo had hissed, lightheaded with rage. "I'll get rid of you - I don't know how, but I will."
> 
> And you did, didn't you? You got rid of her at last.

Wonwoo dreams of a man dressed in white, hair dark and slicked back, staring quietly over Jeonghan's shoulder as he hovers over her. The man's eyes are dark liquid pity, staring into her own eyes.

She feels hatred, so deep and pure.

"I will make you pay." She says to him, to the man she remembers, the man who watched as Jeonghan hurt her and then watched as _he_ hurt her, "I will cut your heart out and feed it to the dogs, skin you alive and leave you to dry out, I will pull your jaw apart so it's like you're screaming without making a sound, I will squeeze your lungs in my fist and eat them, I will make you _suffer_ -"

_Make him hurt, make him hurt like you did, humiliate him and then eat his heart, it's what you deserve, it's your right, make him suffer, pop his pretty eyes out and keep them in a baggie, give them to Jeonghan so he sees them and will have nightmares for the rest of his life, show Jeonghan he should've never crossed you, that you have the power to take everything from him._

_Show him that you are Wonwoo Jeon and you **own** him._

Wonwoo feels the voice rumble in her chest, feels it travel through every cell in her body and knows it's Mingyu.

When she blinks her eyes open he's laying next to her. Wonwoo stares at him for a moment, goosebumps breaking out across her skin. She doesn't run away though, frozen as she stares at Mingyu in the long sleeved shirt he had let her borrow before.

His eyes are closed, eyelids fluttering, and she wonders if demons can dream or sleep at all.

His black hair is messy, seemingly product free as if he had showered.

_Do demons even use hair products?_

His hands are tucked under the pillow he's laying in and his skin is _glittering_ in the early morning light, smooth and blemish free. His breathing is slow and deep, making Wonwoo's eyes feel heavier as the seconds go by. She's lulled into false safety by his calm breathing, since he's been nonthreatening the past week.

_I'm here. I'm right here. Everything will be alright. You can count on me._

He had mellowed out after the incident with her mother, taking on the shape of a cat and curling at the foot of her bed each night, purring until Wonwoo fell asleep.

Wonwoo shifts onto her back, her necklace tightening around her throat, stretching and grunting softly. Mingyu shifts beside her and Wonwoo climbs off the bed. She pulls on the necklace, wonders if she can take it off. She doesn't like how sometimes it feels too heavy, too tight. She wants it off, but something tells her Mingyu would _not_ be pleased.

"Good morning."

Wonwoo doesn't reply, padding out of her room to wake Seulgi up.

Mingyu knows not to follow her.

"Good morning!" Wonwoo bursts into her sister's room, voice loud and cheery. "Time for school!"

Seulgi groans, kicking her blankets off and glaring at her sister. Seulgi looks over her shoulder, eyes still swollen and sleepy and Wonwoo looks back, just in case Mingyu's there, but the hallway is empty.

"Tell Jihoon to come over." Seulgi says, "I miss him."

"You saw him yesterday."

"I like it better when you're both around."

"If I didn't know any better I'd think you have a crush in him."

"Well, good thing you know better."

Wonwoo leaves Seulgi be, satisfied now that she's awake and up.

Wonwoo walks into the kitchen, faltering when she sees Mingyu sitting on the counter. His hair is still soft, but he's wearing a navy blue button up and his usual black skinny jeans.

"I have to meet her, sooner or later." He says, "Having her trust will make things easier."

Wonwoo prickles, "Easier? What do you mean? Make what easier?"

Mingyu kicks his feet, swinging them as if he was a child, head bowed underneath Wonwoo's gaze.

"She'll find out, you know." He says softly, looking at her from beneath his eyelashes. "And if she trusts me now she won't be too upset when she does."

Wonwoo feels the hair on her arms stand, her shoulders tensing, "Find out? Find _what_ out?" Wonwoo says through gritted teeth, casting a look over her shoulder as she creeps closer to Mingyu.

Mingyu shifts, legs spreading open the slightest bit as Wonwoo comes closer, as if making room for her if she chose to come that close to him. Which she doesn't. She doesn't think she'll ever willingly get that close to him.

_She'll find out? What I did? What Jeonghan did? What his friends did? What I did to Mom? She'll find out, she'll find out find out find out she can't she can't I can't let that happen I can't I can't -_

"Not about that. Never about that." He says softly with dark glittering eyes and Wonwoo feels her shoulders droop. "She'll find out about what I am, eventually."

"Why?"

"She's smart."

"I know."

"You know she can feel me, right?"

"What?"

Mingyu tilts his head, leaning back on the palm of his hands, "She can _feel_ when I'm around. Can feel me cling onto you when you get home. I might not be here physically, and she might not see me, but she can_ feel_ me."

Wonwoo thinks back on the times she would hear Seulgi walk by her room during the night, stopping in front of the door and listening. She remembers the times she would open the door for Wonwoo and look over her shoulder as if expecting someone to be behind her.

Wonwoo heaves out a sigh, giving Mingyu her back to rummage through her cabinets for coffee, "I'll think about it."

"Think about what?"

Wonwoo whirls towards Seulgi, turning to look back at where Mingyu sits on the counter when she sees her sister staring in his direction. Mingyu smiles at them, hopping down. Wonwoo stands in front of Seulgi, backing them out of the kitchen.

"Who is this?" Seulgi asks, touching Wonwoo's back lightly. Wonwoo stops, not moving as Seulgi comes to stand next to her.

"Mingyu, nice to meet you."

He makes no move to touch her or get closer, something that somewhat gives Wonwoo relief.

"He's a friend." Wonwoo says to her sister, "From around."

"Oh. Nice to meet you." Seulgi says, scratching her arm awkwardly, "I'm Seulgi."

There's an uncomfortable silence before Seulgi leaves without a word. Wonwoo turns to glare at Mingyu.

"Hey." He says softly, "You can trust me."

_No, I can't. But he was there. He helped you. Healed you. I can't I can't I can't - but he was there! He was there he was there, he helped you, he's helping you_ -

"I promised, didn't I?"

_Get him away from her. Get him **away**._

Wonwoo stalks forward, pressing Mingyu against the counter with a palm against his chest. Mingyu breathes in deep, not shying away from her. Wonwoo hadn't thought about the fact that they're both about the same height until that moment. Wonwoo's heels make her taller than Mingyu more often than not, if only by a little.

Right now, with bare feet, Mingyu is taller than her by a couple of centimeters. Not enough to make her look up at him and not enough for him to look down at her.

"If you hurt her I will find a way to kill you." She says lowly, nostrils flaring, "I don't want you to interact with her without my permission, understood?"

"Understood." He says, unfazed.

Wonwoo pulls away, hair on end and mouth twisted into a scowl.

Wonwoo gets the coffee maker started.

-

Jeonghan climbs into the backseat of her car.

"Good morning!" Seulgi says to him.

"What's so good about it?" Jeonghan grumbles back.

Seulgi talks with Jeonghan all the way to school, even making him laugh once or twice and Wonwoo realizes how lovely he could be.

_What a charming bastard_. She thinks, _No wonder he got a hold of so many._

"Take care, kiddo. Call me if you need anything. See you at home."

"Drive safe, see you at home. Remember to bring Jihoon."

"I will."

There's silence in the car.

"I finished translating my journal."

"Did you?"

"Yeah. I'm working on yours. The purple one."

"Good." More silence before Wonwoo clears her throat. "I need you to meet up with your friend."

"My friend?"

"Yeah, the one dating Yerin."

"Se - "

"Yeah. Him."

"Okay. I will."

"This weekend."

"Okay."

"And I'll tag along."

"What?"

"I'm going to tag along. But don't tell him. We're going to have a chat with him."

Jeonghan stays quiet until Wonwoo parks her car in front of the tall, mostly glass, building they spend their day in.

"We?"

His voice sounds small but he doesn't sound confused at all. He sounds apprehensive and afraid.

"Yes." Wonwoo says, looking straight ahead. "We."

Wonwoo climbs out of her car and leads Jeonghan inside.

"We're going to my place after this, cancel anything you had planned for this afternoon."

Jeonghan doesn't respond.

They part aways and most of the day Wonwoo waits for Mingyu's whispers but he stays strangely absent. It unsettles Wonwoo but she tries to push the feeling aside.

Jihoon stops by her desk a few times, more than usual, like he can tell she feels uneasy. He'd been stopping by her apartment frequently since she told Seulgi she wouldn't have to go back to their mother's house.

Wonwoo thanks him every chance she gets because Jihoon's presence calms Seulgi more than anything Wonwoo tells her can. And it soothes her too. Because when he's around she's at peace, she doesn't have blood covering her hands, her throat doesn't burn.

Wonwoo often spends time sitting on the couch with him, letting Jihoon take off all of her rings while Seulgi does homework on the coffee table. He talks in a low voice and she feels it slither under her skin until all her muscles relax.

She meets up with Jihoon and Jeonghan for lunch in the break room.

"Hey, Jeonghan." Jihoon says, before he turns to Wonwoo, "How's Seulgi doing?"

"She wants you to come over again. She still thinks Mom is going to burst into our apartment to drag her back at any moment."

"Well, you never know with that woman. I'm more than happy to go over when you guys need me to." Jihoon says, opening his soda before he offers some to Wonwoo. Wonwoo takes it and sips from the bottle, wrinkling her nose when the bubbles burn her throat.

"I'm telling you not to worry, she's not a problem anymore." Wonwoo says dismissively, "She wasn't happy about it but I talked some sense into her."

"Well, I'm glad. Seulgi could not stay there any longer." Jihoon says, "She's not used to that side of her like you and Soonyoung were."

Wonwoo raises an eyebrow at him, picking at some leftovers she had packed for work.

"Nothing could ever hold you or him down. Not even your mother." Jihoon says, "Seulgi grew up with a different side of her. This change didn't sit too well on her."

Wonwoo knows Jihoon is right. The mother Seulgi grew up with let her have friends, let her have sleepovers, let her climb trees and run, not by choice but because her eldest children forced her to comply.

The mother she grew up with wailed in the middle of the night day after day, she sobbed without a care of scaring her children, she whispered to thin air. The god awful whispering, the vacant stare she fixed them with. It got on Wonwoo's nerves.

Sometimes she beat them black and blue, yellow and green, pinches them so hard they bled. At first, Wonwoo used to cry out loud, wail and kick and squirm, until she realized that if she fought back, the she'd be backhanded until her lip split. After that, she'd stay quiet even if she cried, she'd let her mother apply some disgusting balm on the bruises and cuts to make them go away, she'd stay still when her mother pressed harder than necessary on her bruises and cuts.

She locked them up so they couldn't go outside looking like that since the balm only took two hours to fix them.

Eventually her mother couldn't get her hands on them, couldn't keep them locked up and it infuriated her. She'd scream when Wonwoo would dodge her instead of freeze, would scowl when Soonyoung would duck under her arm and sprint outside.

She couldn't do anything outside.

Wonwoo remembers the first and last time her mother had tried to lock Seulgi in her room as punishment. She had been chatting with the neighborhood kids and her mother had seen her. Seulgi was six at the time.

Wonwoo still remembers coming out of her room when she heard Seulgi sobbing and banging on the door, "Mommy no! Please, I'm sorry!"

Wonwoo remembers Soonyoung running up the stairs and locking eyes with her.

"What are you doing?" Wonwoo had yelled, storming over as he mother fumbled with the house keys.

"Mom?" Soonyoung spoke softly, far more gently than Wonwoo had. "What's going on?"

"She was with those horrible kids after I clearly told her to stay away from them." Their mother had shrieked, hands trembling. "She doesn't listen to me, like you never listened to me! She can't turn out like you or _Wonwoo_. I refuse - "

"Seulgi needs friends." Wonwoo had said slowly and lowly, stepping into her mother's space. During that time Wonwoo was still growing, towering over her petite mother and matching Soonyoung in height. She was sure she looked intimidating to her mother at that moment, "She's six, she can't be locked up."

"Mom, let Seulgi out." Soonyoung had pleaded, "She's only six mom, you can't try and do this to her too."

Wonwoo to the day doesn't know how Soonyoung remained so calm with Seulgi's desperate wails so close by. She was banging on the door, jiggling the doorknob and begging through hiccups to be let out.

Wonwoo couldn't take it, panic clawing at her throat and heart beating so fast her own hands trembled.

Wonwoo had yanked the keys from her mother's tight grip, shoving her aside. Soonyoung caught her, gasping as her mother's skin beaded lightly with blood from where a charm had scratched her palm.

"You little bit - "

Soonyoung held their mother back, pleading for her to calm down as Wonwoo unlocked the door and all but ripped it off it's hinges. She knelt down to hug Seulgi, scooping her up in her arms even if she was getting too big to properly carry. Seulgi had clung onto her neck, making her shoulder wet and sticky and warm with tears.

"Try that again and I'll make sure you rot in jail. I'll get rid of you." Wonwoo had hissed, lightheaded with rage. "I'll get rid of you - I don't know how, but I will."

_And you did, didn't you? You got rid of her at last._

Wonwoo stiffens in her seat when she hears Mingyu. Jihoon is looking at her, concern clear in his eyes like he upset her when he could never, "Yeah. I know."

"Things will get better when Soonyoung comes back. You'll see." Jihoon says softly.

Jeonghan scoffs quietly and Wonwoo turns to glare at him. Jihoon himself glares at Jeonghan.

"Something funny?"

Jeonghan meets her gaze without fear, cruel amusement clear in his eyes.

_Pluck them out, pluck his pretty eyes out, don't let him mock you, you own him, you decide when he breathes, you decide when his heart will stop beating, do as you will, you OWN HIM._

"Yeah." He doesn't explain, only turns back to his food.

Wonwoo reaches over, wrapping her hand around his wrist and squeezing. Jeonghan flinches, trying to pull his wrist out of her grip. Wonwoo holds on tighter, nails digging in painfully into his skin, and the more Jeonghan pulls, the tighter she squeezes.

_He's mocking you, he thinks you're a joke, he doesn't understand._

"Something funny, Jeonghan?" She asks again, rising from her seat and pressing Jeonghan's wrist down on the table, "Wanna explain the joke to me?"

"Hey, Wonwoo, that's enough - "

_He doesn't **understand** -_

"What's so funny, sweetheart?" Wonwoo says, ignoring Jihoon.

_He needs to understand that you own him._

"Nothing." Jeonghan says, eyes firmly on the table, "Nothing, I'm sorry."

Wonwoo presses down on his wrist one last time and lets go, her own hand hot.

She barely feels it.

Jeonghan books it out of the room, leaving Wonwoo alone with Jihoon. She takes her seat, pressing her hands against her eyes.

"What was that?" Jihoon asks, hand gentle on her arm. "Wonwoo, is everything okay?"

_He'll hate you, don't tell dont tell don't tell don't tell - not yet._

"Yeah. He just... He's an asshole sometimes."

"And you need to hurt him because...?"

Wonwoo can't meet Jihoon's eyes.

"I don't want to. I don't want to hurt anyone but they give me no choice and I - "

"Wonwoo?"

Wonwoo forces herself to look at Jihoon, finds expectant eyes. Warm, inviting, knowing. Wonwoo remembers all the times Jihoon accepted all her worries, helped shoulder the burdens she carried ranging from not doing her homework to sheltering her when she sneaked out to holding her while she cried.

"I'm sorry."

"There's something you're not telling me. Something that has to do with Jeonghan and those books and Soonyoung. You know you can trust me with anything, right?"

"I know, I know I can, I want to tell you but nothing will be the same if I do. Nothing. I don't want to lose you too."

Wonwoo's breathing quickens, hands trembling and cold sweat rolling down her back.

What would she do without Jihoon? What would Seulgi do without him? He's all they have. Wonwoo could live without her mother, Seulgi would accept she was gone, could rest easier knowing she was. Soonyoung would be back, but what would she do without Jihoon?

"You won't lose me. Ever."

"This isn't like before, Jihoon. This isn't fixable. This isn't something that can be forgotten. I don't want to lose you."

Jihoon grabs Wonwoo's hands, squeezing, "You never will. Trust me. Ride or die, like the cool kids say."

Wonwoo's lips form a shaky and crooked smile. "Okay. Okay. I'll tell. Just... not here."

Jihoon smiles back Wonwoo, "Wherever, wherever you want. I just don't want you to carry all of this on your own."

"What would I do without you?"

Wonwoo hugs Jihoon and tries to forget all she's done.

-

Jeonghan is left alone with Wonwoo and Mingyu.

They're in Wonwoo's living room, waiting for Jihoon and Seulgi to come back from buying some take out. Wonwoo is sitting on the couch, Mingyu next to her on the arm rest and Jeonghan is sitting on the floor with the coffee table between him and them.

"I'll go over this with Mingyu." Wonwoo says, flipping through the journal. "Get started on Soonyoung's journal."

"Okay."

"And make sure your friend agrees to meet up. This weekend."

Jeonghan stays silent.

"Understood?" Jeonghan is fidgeting and it makes Wonwoo's skin crawl with irritation, "What is it?"

"I don't...I don't think I can help you." Jeonghan says, standing up and pacing around her living room, "I just..."

"What do you mean?" Wonwoo says rising from her own seat.

"You should be used to this." Mingyu says, "It's not like it's going to be your first kill."

Jeonghan doesn't meet their eyes and stiffens when Wonwoo stands in front of him, "He's too dangerous for me I don't think I can help."

"You're scared of him?" Mingyu taunts from behind them, "Why?"

"No, I just - "

"You shouldn't be scared of him." Wonwoo interrupts, jabbing a finger in Jeonghan's chest, "You should be scared of me. Because - _because_ I can find her, Jeonghan. The pretty girl in the purple jacket? I can and will find her."

Jeonghan's lips are trembling, shuffling back bit by bit as Wonwoo crowds him against a wall.

"I will find her and let someone do to her what was done to me, I will cut her tongue out and put it in a baggie. I'll pop her eyes out too. All while you watch."

Wonwoo is panting, pressing up against Jeonghan even if her body shivers with disgust, bile rising up her throat as the threats leave her mouth. Wonwoo is trembling all over.

"And I will find your parents and give the baggie to them as a gift." Wonwoo breathes against Jeonghan's cheek, "They won't be able to look at you at all after they find out you were there. They'll never be the same and I'll let you live with that. Unable to fix it, unable to be around them without remembering how you failed, without being able to tell them who did it, unable to be around me yet I'll be here. I'll let you live with that pain for a little while before I kill them too."

Wonwoo pulls back, hands settling on Jeonghan's shoulders, fingers twitching as she waits for him to push her off, waits for an excuse to make him bleed. She feels an eerie calm rolling over her, making her limbs steady, "You're coming with me. And you'll help me kill your friend and his demon."

Jeonghan stares at her, body tense and eyes wild with hate, "Okay."

Wonwoo grins, patting Jeonghan's cheek roughly before she steps back, "Leave the translation and the original before you leave."

Jeonghan nods, grasping the wall for balance.

"He really is a coward." Mingyu mutters to himself.

Jeonghan leaves with a slam of the door, making Mingyu chuckle.

Wonwoo ignores Mingyu, not sparing him a glance when she leaves to her room. He trails after her, Wonwoo can feel it, but when she turns around he's not there.

"Mingyu?"

"Yes, sweetheart?" It comes from behind her and Wonwoo turns around to see him laying on her bed, back into the shape of a black cat.

"When are you going to teach me how to turn bodies into ashes?"

"You're going to turn Seungcheol's body into ashes?"

The front door opens, Seulgi's voice carrying into the bedroom, "Guys? We're back! Time to feast like kings!" Wonwoo hears Jihoon's laughter.

Wonwoo doesn't answer Mingyu, even when she hears him say, "I'll show you when we have him." She just nods, closing her bedroom door behind her.

"Where's Jeonghan?" Seulgi asks when she returns to the living room. She looks around, eyes expectant like she thinks Jeonghan is hiding from her.

She can feel him, Wonwoo thinks when Seulgi stares over her shoulder a little too long with a confused face. She can feel Mingyu around.

"Something came up, I think, he didn't really tell me."

Seulgi shrugs, setting down the bags in her hand, "Boo. His loss."

Jihoon looks at Wonwoo with knowing eyes and she feels shame roll through her.

The rest of the evening is enjoyable, Jihoon taking her rings off and Seulgi raising an eyebrow at her when Jihoon spreads lotion on her hands and massages them.

Wonwoo only raises an eyebrow back at her.

"Wonwoo... Who's the guy who was here this morning?" Seulgi asks when Jihoon is gone. She asks it softly, eyes on her phone even if Wonwoo knows she's not paying attention to it.

Wonwoo sighs, resting her head back on the couch, "He's a friend. He stopped by for a minute."

Seulgi doesn't look convinced, "Just a friend. What did he want?

"Yeah. I met him in a party, he lives nearby. He's helping me with Soonyoung's journals."

"Does Jihoon - "

"Nope. And he doesn't have to. There's no reason to."

Seulgi shrugs and Wonwoo knows she won't drop it.

Wonwoo gets up with a sigh, "Don't stay up too late."

And so Wonwoo goes to bed with a devil at her feet.

A devil that purrs and blinks at her with blue eyes and lulls her to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! this time i took less than two months to update, how about that? Abrupt Ending because the chapter was dragging on and if i couldn't find a way to end it. Also, bad guy seungcheol. how about that.
> 
> some things that some might wonder about and things i know but forget that yall don't:
> 
> -secretary ww. idk abt jihoon n jeonghan, they work at an office deal with numbers and signing papers probably.  
-tall woman ww. normal height is 6ft. regularly wears heels so she's Super Tall.  
-skirt wearing ww. she wears button up and skirts and heels for work and a whole lot of rings. she prefers rings over necklaces and bracelets. she also likes earrings. she dresses in jeans and nonformal skirts outside of work.  
-wonwoo is not attracted to mingyu at all. even if i write about how hot he is, wonwoo isn't attracted to him. one thing is recognizing beauty, another is being attracted to it.
> 
> my goal here is mingyu being beautiful but horrifying in wonwoo's eyes. she doesn't trust him, she hates him, she regrets what she's done and they're both incredibly toxic and it will probably only get worse.
> 
> as always, i hope you enjoyed the chapter, please tell me what you think.


	7. chapter seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She knows things aren't over. Far from it. He's not going to let things go, he will get in her way and she has to stop him before she has to do something she will regret.

Jeonghan Yoon regrets many things.

Mostly he regrets messing with Wonwoo Jeon.

He regrets the moment he laid eyes on her and thought she hadn't suffered enough. She simply hadn't suffered enough, but she would. He would see to that. He would make her suffer - truly suffer. He would make her cry and bleed, make her see that the world was not as nice as she thought it was.

_Who do you think you are? To know how someone sees the world, to decide someone hasn't suffered enough, to take someone's life._

Jeonghan hadn't known that Wonwoo Jeon was broken far beyond repair before he broke her _further_.

He hadn't known that by laying his hands on her, tiny splinters made up of her bones would dig into his skin and subsequently into his family's skin. He hadn't known.

And because of all that he did, his sins would follow those dear to him.

_He hadn't known_.

Had he known Wonwoo Jeon would've followed damnation no matter what, he would've steered clear of her path. Had he known Wonwoo Jeon suffered greatly and will continue to do so, he would've never even laid eyes on her. Had he known what Wonwoo Jeon was capable of, had he known she was inevitable, he would've been on her good side since the beginning.

"Oh, darling. _My_ darling. The things you will go through."

Jeonghan turns to look at Minghao. He lays with hair falling over his cheek and forehead, skin soft under the moonlight and black eyes dewy. It's like he's always on the verge of crying.

"I don't want to." He says, curling closer to Minghao.

Minghao had been a source of comfort, per say.

"I will die at Her hands. Your family's well-being depends on you." He's told Jeonghan many times and will continue to do so. That's the kind of person he is. Truthful and kind. "Seungcheol and Junhui will also die. One at his hands, one because She wills it so."

Jeonghan trembles. With fear, with impotence, with anger, with sorrow.

Jeonghan thinks of Wonwoo Jeon. He remembers when she told him about her mother.

"See, Jeonghan, I killed her." And if she can kill her own mother, she will have no qualms killing anyone else he had realized. "I made her chest cave in, I made her drown in her own blood, I saw the life leave her eyes."

Jeonghan hadn't answered, ignored the way her eyes filled with tears and Jeonghan knew they weren't tears of regret, of sadness, of fear of what she did. No, the tears were of acceptance of what she is and what she will become. They were tears of sorrow for what she once was.

Maybe she didn't fully know why she cried, but Jeonghan did.

Minghao knows, so Jeonghan knows too.

Jeonghan knows more about Wonwoo Jeon than she realizes, Jeonghan is at the mercy of Wonwoo Jeon to extents she has no clue of yet - he is _tied_ to her and there is _nothing_ he can do about it.

Minghao runs his fingertips through Jeonghan's tears, smearing them over his skin. He shuffles closer to press a kiss on Jeonghan's forehead.

"She is the beginning. She is the end. She is all. I have betrayed Her and I will continue to do so. It is my duty to die at Her hands. It is only right. It is the only way She will ever forgive me." Minghao says and Jeonghan chokes on a sob. "I wish I had more time with you, but I will never truly leave you. Never. I will live within Her and within _you_."

Jeonghan meets Minghao's eyes, sitting up in bed.

He always says that. Beginning. End. Betrayal. Within. It's the one thing he won't explain.

Minghao leans up and presses his lips to Jeonghan's, his eyes finally, _finally_, spilling tears and Jeonghan tastes them on his lips. Minghao pulls back and for the first time since he's said the phrase, he sounds absolutely and sincerely sorrowful, "Oh, darling. My darling. The _things_ you will go through."

-

Wonwoo wakes to the sight of Mingyu next to her.

He glitters and glows, soft and dewy, ethereal and innocent and Wonwoo hates it.

_Scratch his skin until it bleeds, paint his skin with his own blood until he glows pink and red and white and make sure looks at you, make him look only at you, make him look up at you from where he kneels, make him -_

Wonwoo stares until Mingyu shifts and only then does she leave the bed.

_Will this become routine?_

It appears so because she finds Mingyu in the kitchen after she wakes Seulgi and Seulgi sees Mingyu on the kitchen counter again, except this time she eyes him with curiosity.

"Good morning." She says. Wonwoo turns to look at Mingyu, notices how he smiles easily, blinding and beautiful. It screams _fake_ but it seems to work on Seulgi, who creeps closer. Wonwoo stares at the side of his face, hopes he can feel her stare burning into his skin. Mingyu turns to look at her.

_May I? I need your permission after all._

Wonwoo tilts her head.

"Good morning, Seulgi."

Seulgi blushes at the way Mingyu coos her name and clears her throat, "So, where do you live?"

"Half an hour away."

Seulgi hums, maneuvering around them both to fix herself a bowl of cereal before she takes her place next to Wonwoo, resting against the kitchen counter. Mingyu continues to sit _on_ the counter across from them, answering Seulgi's rapid fire questions.

She all but interrogates Mingyu, asking about small, irrelevant things that nobody but her would ask. Wonwoo finds it embarrassing yet amusing.

"Why do you need to know all this?"

"Well, since Soonyoung isn't here someone has to take care of you."

"I'm ten years older than you, I don't need taking care of."

"_Hey_ \- I'm just looking out for you."

"And it's charming. Cute." Mingyu says and Seulgi blushes again.

"Annoying, that's what she is."

"You're one to talk." Seulgi whines, "Miss _I let my best friend rub lotion on my hands while I watch_. Seriously, what was that? It made my skin crawl. So cheesy."

Wonwoo sighs, placing a hand on her forehead, "Just. Go finish getting ready."

Seulgi makes a face at her and leaves.

Wonwoo scowls at Mingyu, "Is this going to become a thing? You here in the mornings?"

Mingyu shrugs, "Does it bother you?"

"Yes."

"Why? I'm doing no harm, am I?"

"I don't want you anywhere near her, but since you won't respect that one request," Wonwoo says, "I'd rather not start her days with you here."

Mingyu doesn't reply.

"Anyway, we need to talk about the first journal. Preferably today, after work."

Mingyu stares at Wonwoo with flat eyes, mouth twisted into a slight frown.

_Did I upset him?_

Wonwoo stares back, heart speeding up, "Meet me here after work. Please."

"Well, since you asked so nicely - " Mingyu says, eyes lighting up.

Someone knocks on the door. Soft yet deafening in her ears.

_Who? Who is that? What do they want, why are they - who? Who, who, **who**?_

Wonwoo looks in the direction of the door, "If it's Jihoon make sure he can't see you, understand?"

Mingyu's frown returns.

Wonwoo goes to the door, pulling it open as calmly as she can only to tense when she sees who's on the other side, "Good morning."

"Wonwoo." Jihoon says, fidgeting in front of her, "Good morning."

Wonwoo steps aside to let Jihoon in. She takes a deep breath, limbs jerking awkwardly as she shuts the door and turns to face her best friend. She feels on edge, her mind wandering to Mingyu in the kitchen.

Wonwoo slips past Jihoon carefully. She leads Jihoon to the living room, gesturing for him to take a seat. Jihoon doesn't, staring down at the floor, lost in thought, "What's up? Is everything okay?"

Jihoon takes a deep breath, shuffling awkwardly and avoiding her eyes. It makes Wonwoo frown with concern. "Just wanted to chat. Before work."

"Okay, but I have to take Seulgi to school soon and we have to get to the office soon." She says, sitting on the couch and patting the seat next to her.

"Yeah." Jihoon says, placing a hand on his forehead as he sits down. "Okay, I'll make this... quick."

Jihoon takes another deep breath. He stays quiet, fidgeting and staring at the floor beneath him until he snaps his head up to look at Wonwoo, "You know you can trust me, right? With anything - and I mean _anything_."

Wonwoo feels her chest tighten to the point of being suffocating, her body going cold while a thousand thoughts run through her mind.

_Does he know about my mother? About him? About Mingyu? About Jeonghan?_

"Yeah. I know. Jihoon, is there anything you want to tell me?"

"Is there anything you want to tell _me_?"

Wonwoo doesn't reply, breathing sharply. Fingers tug on her necklace, metal chain digging into her skin and pendant biting the palm of her hand.

Jihoon purses his mouth, "Wonwoo, I don't know how to stay this, but. I know. I know about..."

Wonwoo stiffens, free hand curling up into fists in her lap, "Know about _what_, Jihoon?"

"About... about what they did to you." He says quietly. "I know you went to a party a couple of weeks ago and I know something horrible happened to you."

Wonwoo feels the blood leave her face.

_'What they did to you'. At least it's not 'what you did', huh? But he knows, how does he know? Who told him? Since when?_

"Jihoon, I don't understand."

Jihoon's eyes haven't left her face and Wonwoo feels like she can't breathe.

_Oh, god, he knows, he knows and he hates me, he'll tell Seulgi, he'll never look at me the same, oh, god, he knows, he knows, he knows, he **knows** \- _

"Someone sent me a video." He says quietly, eyes closing, "And I saw - I saw what happened to you."

They stay quiet for a while.

"I need to see that video."

"Wonwoo, I don't... I don't think that's...I don't want to make you even more uncomfortable than I've already made you."

"I need to see that video, Jihoon."

Jihoon takes out his phone, tapping at the screen before handing it to Wonwoo.

It's her. It's her in _that_ moment.

She can hear her screams, her sobs, her pain. She can hear _his_ laughter. So much laughter and the thump of music above them and Wonwoo feels like she's suffocating.

The angle is over _his_ shoulder, giving clear view of her face and of his profile. She's still begging, can still talk, which means Jeonghan hadn't touched her yet. She can see someone crouching near her head, face not visible. Only a pair of slacks and shiny rings on long, elegant fingers dangling between knees.

She doesn't remember who it was. She only remembers Jeonghan and - and Seungcheol and the man in white hovering over his shoulder.

Who is that?

Wonwoo starts to tremble, sweat beading at her temple, "Who sent you that?"

Jihoon looks at her, eyes empty and sad. Wonwoo feels _horrible_. She feels the contents on her stomach try to come back up, her vision swimming and her hands trembling. She can't breathe, feeling light-headed as she tries to focus on Jihoon.

"I don't know. Someone just sent it and I woke up and I saw it and I..." Jihoon says, "I want to..."

_Seulgi's here._ Wonwoo remembers with a shuddering breath, her lungs expanding painfully.

"Oh, god." Wonwoo says, resting her face in her hands. "Jihoon. I can't talk about this, Seulgi's here and - "

"Wonwoo." Jihoon says, voice carrying sadness Wonwoo didn't know Jihoon was capable of. "We need to talk about this. I'm sorry you went through this and - "

"I know, but Seulgi's here - "

"We need to talk about this. These guy did something _horrible_ to you, Won."

Wonwoo looks over her shoulder, panic rising at the thought of Seulgi coming out.

"Jihoon, please, we'll talk about - "

"I want to know wh - why - why you didn't tell me." 

Wonwoo feels her face get hot with shame and anger.

"Jihoon - "

"Why didn't you tell me about what happened? Oh, _Wonwoo_ \- "

"Want to talk about it?" Wonwoo spits out, "Okay. I'll tell you. I was raped." Wonwoo says, watching horror cloud Jihoon's face. "He _raped_ me."

"Oh, god." Jihoon makes a move to stand from the couch, but Wonwoo only pulls him down, a clear sign for him to remain seated, "Wonwoo - "

"I wanted to relax, I thought I deserved to, but I guess not. He lured me downstairs and he hurt me in ways you can't even think of. In front of others who did nothing but watch. I screamed for him to stop, but he wouldn't. He hurt me, he held me down and he wouldn't stop."

"Oh, no." Jihoon whimpers, tears in his eyes, sitting still as stone, "Oh, god, Wonwoo - "

"And not just me." Wonwoo whispers, "There's been so many. He's hurt so many."

"Oh, god." Jihoon moans, sob choking him up, "I knew something was going on, adding to Soonyoung's disappearance, but I never thought - "

"You knew?" Wonwoo echoes.

"I thought you had a fight with your mother or something, I didn't, I didn't know, oh god, Wonwoo - "

"Listen to me, Jihoon." Wonwoo says, grabbing Jihoon's face between her hands so he faces Wonwoo. She wipes Jihoon's tears away, her vision swaying from exhaustion, "He will continue to hurt others unless I put a stop to it."

"What do you mean?" Jihoon whispers back. "What - "

"I need to kill him, Jihoon."

"What?" Jihoon says, eyes wide, "No, no, we can't, we need to go to the police, they can - "

"They won't do shit." Wonwoo says, standing from the couch, "We both know that."

Jihoon stands too, grabbing Wonwoo's hands between his own. "Wonwoo, we have solid evidence, this will help, they can do something about it."

"No." Wonwoo says firmly, "It has been decided. It will be carried out. The cops can't stop him. I know."

"Wonwoo I can't let you do this." Jihoon says in distress, "You'll ruin your life, think of Seulgi - "

"I won't get caught." Wonwoo says, "Trust me. I will make him pay. I will make him hurt, too."

Jihoon looks horrified, mouth opening and closing, eyes brimming with tears again, face flushed an angry red.

"Don't try to stop me." Wonwoo says quietly, pulling her hands away from Jihoon's, "Please don't make me do something I'll regret."

Jihoon freezes, Wonwoo recoiling at the words that leave her mouth. She had just threatened her best friend of almost twenty years. Her vision goes blurry again, this time from tears. She blinks them away, pinching the bridge of her nose trying to lessen her headache.

"Wonwoo? What do you mean?" Jihoon asks, sitting back down on the couch. He looks pale, alarmed.

"It means she'll get rid of you."

Wonwoo turns to look at Mingyu, head swimming with anger and panic.

"I told you to stay away." She hisses, stepping forward. She intends to push him back into the kitchen, only her surroundings start to spin again and make her jerk to a halt. Mingyu offers his arm as support and Wonwoo grabs it in order to steady herself.

"Who are you?" Jihoon snaps from behind her, "Were you listening to our conversation?"

"I already know everything." Mingyu says, stepping closer to Wonwoo, "I was just following orders but you've upset her too much. If she passed out, I doubt you'd be of much help."

Wonwoo doesn't need to look at Jihoon to know he's scowling at Mingyu.

"We'll talk about this another day, Jihoon." Wonwoo says, turning to look at him while still holding onto Mingyu. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I wanted to deal with this on my own. I wanted to take my time."

Jihoon's eyes soften when they meet hers, "I'm sorry. For - for everything, I'm - "

"I know." Wonwoo replies, letting go of Mingyu and stepping away until she's sitting next to Jihoon again. "I know. But, please. Please, _please_. Let me handle this. Don't... Don't tell anyone. Everything will be okay. Trust me."

Jihoon looks at her, apprehension in his eyes, before he puts his pinky finger out between them. "Okay. Trust. Promise."

Wonwoo wraps her pinky around Jihoon's, squeezing gently. She doesn't smile, doesn't think she can, but she knows Jihoon understands that she's grateful.

And just how Jihoon understands her, she understands him. She understands why his lips tremble and why he pulls away first.

_Different. Things have shifted. They have changed. I need to - he's gonna - _

She knows things aren't over. Far from it. He's not going to let things go, he will get in her way and she has to stop him before she has to do something she will regret.

"Yikes." Seulgi says from the hallway, "Did I interrupt?"

Wonwoo looks over to her sister. Her face is concerned, eyes flicking from Jihoon's red eyes to Mingyu's threatening stance before settling on Wonwoo's exhausted form. Her face twists in a way that means she's not happy with the men in the room.

_You okay?_

"Ready, kiddo?" She says, smiling at her.

_I'm fine._

"Yeah. Are you?" She asks, coming to stand next to her. She pulls Wonwoo away from Jihoon and Mingyu, gesturing to her room, "Go get ready. I'll wait. It won't kill me to be late this one time. I'll babysit and then we can leave."

Wonwoo squeezes Seulgi's shoulder in thanks before shutting herself in her room.

-

Jeonghan is quieter than usual. Dark purple rests underneath his eyes and his skin is pale like he hasn't seen the sun in days.

"Something on your mind?" Wonwoo asks, quietly, looking away from the rearview mirror.

Jeonghan doesn't say anything, head tilted back against his headrest. Wonwoo doesn't push for an answer, eyes straight on the road.

She thinks back on Seulgi, and her concerned questions.

"Why was Jihoon crying? Did he fight with Mingyu? Is everything okay?"

"Everything is fine. Don't worry about it."

"She didn't hear anything," Mingyu had said, sitting in the passenger seat. He was watching Wonwoo who in turn watched Seulgi's retreating back."I know it'd hurt you if she did, so I stopped her from hearing anything."

"I don't have a sin. He's not mine." Jeonghan says at last, eyes closed and head still tilted back. "Not in the way Mingyu is yours."

"What do you mean?"

"I did''t summon him. Not really. He just... appeared." Jeonghan says, "And he helped me. I owe him... everything."

"Can they do that?"

"Yeah. As long as they give something to the higher ups, it's no problem."

"What?"

Wonwoo can hear Jeonghan shuffle in the back.

"Have you not talked about this with Mingyu?"

"No." Wonwoo says, "I don't really - "

"Care?"

"Trust him."

"But you care?"

"Not exactly."

"Must be nice."

"Do you care? About your - your sin?"

Jeonghan hesitates, "Yeah. Too much."

"Why?"

"I was damned from the moment I was a possibility."

Wonwoo parks her car, staring at the building in front of her.

"Damned?"

"Damned to this life. To live it over and over again until I ended up with the most painful outcome."

Wonwoo feels her chest tighten with... sympathy? Pity? Sorrow? Recognition?

Wonwoo locks eyes with Jeonghan through the mirror.

"We really need to talk." She says at last, "There's so much I don't know, so much I don't understand."

"We'll talk. During lunch?"

It's the first time they've been civil.

"Yeah. Okay."

Jeonghan's mouth twitches, like he wants to smile, like he wants to frown, like he's surprised, like he's pleased.

Without another word, he steps out of the car and leaves Wonwoo behind.

-

"I got Seungcheol to agree to meeting up. This Sunday." Jeonghan announces during their lunch break. It's just him and her. Jihoon called in sick. Of course he did. "But he wants to meet up at my house."

"Why?" Wonwoo asks, "Is his house unavailable?"

"Yeah. He lives with his girlfriend and he thinks I want to see him for, you know." Jeonghan is not meeting Wonwoo's eyes.

"For?" Wonwoo prompts, impatient.

"He thinkes I want to sleep with him and we can't do that at his place since she'll be at home." Jeonghan says curtly, taking a sip from his water bottle.

Wonwoo leans back in her chair, studying Jeonghan, mouth twisting with amusement, "Why does he think that?"

Jeonghan glares at her, pursing his lips, "Where's Jihoon?"

"He found out. Called in sick."

Jeonghan raises an eyebrow, tilting his head in confusion, "He found out?"

"Yes. Someone sent him a video. Of that day."

Jeonghan eyes go wide, "What?"

"Someone sent him a video. Don't know who. We gotta figure that out."

"What did he say - "

"So, Sunday at your place?" Wonwoo speaks over Jeonghan, "Good. Makes things easier."

"For you. I'm gonna be stuck with the aftermath."

Wonwoo shrugs.

"Shouldn't be too hard. Have your sin help you out."

Jeonghan rolls his eyes at him.

"What did you mean, by the way, this morning."

"About what?"

"Higher ups."

"Our Sin's... parents you could say. They're pure, true."

"There's something stronger than our sins?"

"Yes." Jeonghan says, "They each have a journal. The journal of Wrath, Lust, Greed, Envy, Sloth, Gluttony, Pride. There's ways to summon Sins, perform sacrifices, rituals, blessings."

"Oh." Wonwoo says, "How many journals do we have?"

"Three of seven."

"Which ones?"

"Wrath, envy, lust."

"Lust?"

"Yeah. The purple one."

_Soonyoung._

"So there's two types. Of sin."

"Well, no, but yes? Your Sin is a Sin. My Sin is a Sin. Their higher ups? Kind of. They are pure. They are true. They are a beginning. They are not sin, they are much _more_, much more powerful, we can't compare the two. Our Sins originated from them."

"Okay. So, there's the True and the Sin."

"Yes. The pure and the ones we come in contact with. The True and the Sin. People usually call Sin demons, devils, whatever. They come into contact with us, they serve us for something in exchange, sometimes they groom us to take back to the True."

"But it... it makes sense, no? They're cruel and have no remorse. They can kill and hurt with no problem."

"Yes, that's true, but the True are exactly the same, yet we... we call the True gods, goddesses because the very, very, very few who have come in contact with them and lived see them as such. They are... pure. Something otherworldly, something we can't comprehend or translate and if we try, we can only call them gods. But they are cruel too. Crueler than our Sins and vile and have less morals than our Sins."

Wonwoo frowns thoughtfully.

"Most who have been around both would rather be with the cruelest Sin than with the most merciful True." Jeonghan says, "That says something, huh?"

"Have you been around a True?"

"No. And yes."

"What?"

"I haven't been around them. But I was close to one, once. By accident." Jeonghan says, "I was ten miles away from Envy and... it was something else. You could feel him from that distance. It made you feel some sort of ecstasy. Something in me wanted to crawl on my hands and knees to him, to beg at his feet and give my life to him. He radiates power. Raw and pure. I almost went crazy." Jeonghan laughs, smiling down at his store bought lunch. It was mostly untouched, only picked at and shoved around.

"Is he the most powerful?"

"No. Not at all. He's the second weakest of them all. Makes you wonder how powerful the strongest one is. Who would be able to live through that, being near their presence?"

Wonwoo sighs, mind racing, sagging into her chair, "God, this is fucked."

Jeonghan laughs again and Wonwoo feels her own mouth stretch into a smile. Jeonghan doesn't stop laughing, leaning against the table, when he says in the most resigned voice she's ever heard, "_We're_ fucked."

Wonwoo laughs along with Jeonghan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh my GOD this was a bitch to write. knew what I wanted, didn't have to words.
> 
> I was so unsatisfied with this chapter, couldn't even look at it. but! I did something I throughly regret and I desperately want to forget and that's spurred me on haha! I was in a bad place and I managed to finish this chapter. it helped me feel better thank fuck.
> 
> as always, please let me know what you think, I will try to finish the next chapter sooner, I appreciate every single one of you.
> 
> see you next chapter.


	8. chapter eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's helping me with the resentment I was born with, he's helping me with sins I never knew I carried, he's helping me bring Soonyoung back even if it's selfish.

_He's not here. Where is he?_

After lunch on her way to her desk, Wonwoo realizes she has not heard from Mingyu since she left the apartment and it makes her skin buzz with anxiety.

_Where is he?_

Wonwoo taps her fingers against her necklace, the pendant cold against her skin.

She doesn't want to reach out. She feels silly doing so since she doesn't exactly know how.

_Do I call out his name? Think it? _

She goes through the rest of the day with her fingers fiddling with her necklace absentmindedly, running around with papers in need of signatures, reminding her boss about meetings, and distracting herself with thoughts about Yerin for the first time since Jeonghan said, "His name is Seungcheol Choi. He has a Sin too. He needed an offering and you were - you were there. He lives half an hour away by car."

She thinks about Yerin and how she could barely look her in the eye after that.

Wonwoo knows Yerin doesn't know. She knows Yerin had no part in her suffering, but all she can think about is how Yerin has touched _him_ and how _he_ has touched her.

It made her sick thinking about it and she couldn't stand it when Yerin cupped her elbow when she laughed, couldn't stand it when Yerin placed a hand on her arm when she greeted her in the morning.

_Some things are easier from a distance._

She still smiled at Yerin when they saw each other in the hallway, but whenever Yerin approached her Wonwoo would retreat. _Bathroom_, she'd say. Or, _need to finish some paperwork._

Eventually Yerin stopped talking to her like she did before. No lunch breaks together, no gossiping in the hallways, no shared drinks, no playful banter.

Just polite smiles.

_I'm going to break her heart._

Wonwoo leaves with Jeonghan in tow.

"Did you know..." Wonwoo says lowly when they're in her car, "That Yerin is dating Seungcheol?"

Jeonghan turns to look at her and Wonwoo remembers the cold look on his face when she told him that she had killed her own mother.

Not fear, not disgust, not surprise, no. None of that. What did he think, Wonwoo wonders, when she described how warm her mother's blood was? How satisfying it was look in her eyes and see her hatred dim until there was nothing left.

"Yerin is dating Seungcheol." Wonwoo continues, "They've been together for almost two years. Living together for almost eight months. He bought her a big shiny ring for their anniversary."

"How do you know that?"

Wonwoo pulls out of the parking lot, not sparing a glance at Jeonghan, "Because Yerin _told_ me."

"Huh. And here I thought that bitch didn't have friends at the office."

"She's one of the nicest people I've ever met." Wonwoo replies softly, "She deserves happiness."

"But you're still going to kill her boyfriend."

Wonwoo's grasp on the steering wheel tightens, "Yeah."

They stay quiet until they arrive at Wonwoo's apartment.

Seulgi is waiting for her, opening the door before Wonwoo can even twist the key.

"Wonwoo, um, Mingyu's here and..." She says lowly, "He wants to talk to you?"

Wonwoo hesitates at the doorway, looking over Seulgi's head to see Mingyu sitting on her couch, his back facing her. She takes off her heels, walking in with Seulgi and Jeonghan following behind. Jeonghan sits on the floor between the coffee table and the tv while Seulgi sits as far away as she can from Mingyu.

"Sweetheart, hello."

_Where were you?_

"Mingyu." Wonwoo says tersely, holding eye contact with him until her head pulses and she has to look away.

Seulgi begins telling Jeonghan about her day, both visibly uncomfortable with Mingyu around and trying to make up for the awkward atmosphere with mindless chatter. Wonwoo leaves to her room, head pulsing.

She tries to prepare herself mentally for the conversation she'll have with Jeonghan and Mingyu.

_Where was he?_

She changes into something comfortable, pulling two journals out of her nightstand.

Usually Mingyu would be in her room, waiting as himself or as a cat, but today her room is empty and Mingyu is in her living room after a day full of his absence.

_Where was he? Why wasn't he - with who - where was he?_

When Wonwoo comes back to the living room Mingyu smiles at her and Wonwoo's headache grows.

"So. Why did you come by, Mingyu?" Seulgi says from her spot on the couch. Her voice is nowhere near as warm as it was during the morning.

Mingyu blinks innocently at Seulgi, smiling like he did during the morning, like he doesn't notice the way Seulgi's gaze is pointed and cold, "I needed to talk with Wonwoo."

Jeonghan is trying not to look at Mingyu, gaze fixed anywhere but him, and Wonwoo feels a little irritated.

_Why doesn't he have trouble looking at me? I'm the one who could hurt him, could destroy his life. I don't need Mingyu for that, he just makes things easier, why -_

"I need are some pills." Wonwoo grumbles. Her head pulses when she looks at Mingyu again and it makes her eyes water, "My head is killing me."

_Where was he? Why wasn't he waiting for me? What was he doing?_

"I'll get them for you." Seulgi says, already leaving the living room.

"How are we supposed to talk about Seungcheol with her here?" Jeonghan asks, eyes flitting between her and Mingyu before settling back on her.

"We're just going to discuss the journals until she gets bored." Wonwoo says, handing over the original journal to Mingyu and keeping the translation to herself. She takes a seat on the armchair, groaning like it took great effort to sit down.

She feels tired, so tired and Jeonghan looks ready to argue on Seulgi's behalf and Wonwoo hopes he does just so she can snap at him.

"She'll get bored at some point, or it'll make her too uncomfortable and she'll leave." She says, "She doesn't like thinking about Soonyoung too much."

"That's - "

"Here they are." Seulgi says, startling Jeonghan, presenting a bottle of ibuprofen and a glass of water to Wonwoo before sitting back on the couch. "So, what are you guys doing?"

"Just looking over some of Soonyoung's journals." Wonwoo says, popping two pills in her mouth and taking a gulp of water, "Wanna see if - if they can give me a clue of what the fuck he was doing, what he was thinking when he - when he left or - " Wonwoo cuts herself off, lips pursed with annoyance at herself.

Seulgi nods, crossing her legs on the couch and licking her lips, "Yeah. I know. What are the journals about? I've seen Jeonghan work on them but I never really asked what they're about."

"That's what I was about to ask." Wonwoo sighs, "Please, Mingyu, tell me about the journal."

"Well, since you asked so politely... This is Envy's journal. His color is white, he's The Man Dressed in Flowers. He is the second weakest True Sin. To know how things works, we need some background. Each True Sin has their own journal, their own Blessings."

"Blessings?" Wonwoo asks.

"Blessings. Something a True gives you in exchange for something. A boost in luck, a change you want, someone's attention. Things like that. To get these Blessings, there are rituals one must do. All rituals require a sacrifice. No exceptions. The stronger the True is, the more power one must have to perform rituals. When you do a ritual the bigger the sacrifice, the stronger the Blessing will be. Sacrificing a small animal won't give you the same results as sacrificing a human."

Wonwoo flips through the translation, fingers tracking what she's reading.

"To Make One's Own. Luck Transfer. What's the one you - " Seulgi shifts in her seat and Wonwoo looks at Seulgi, blinking like she forgot her sister was there before clearing her throat. "What's the one you mentioned to me called? The one with the ashes."

"Ah." Mingyu says, crossing his legs, "That one is called To Grow. But that one is in Gluttony's journal."

"Oh." Wonwoo frowns, "But do you - can you tell me what it's for?"

Mingyu rests his chin on top of his fist, not breaking eye contact with her when he begins to recite as if from memory, "To Grow. Consume the dead and become one. Willingly or not, it does not matter, the one you want to become one with must be dead. Draw the sigil of rebirth on the dead's skin and consume to one's desire. The more one consumes, the more the two beings merge."

Wonwoo is pale.

"That's - " Wonwoo looks at him, conflicted because Seulgi is right there but her mother isn't _gone_, she's not _gone_, she's with _her_, "Two beings merge?"

Mingyu smiles and Wonwoo hated him before but now she hates him even more.

"Yes."

_She's with me, she in me, she didn't leave, I didn't get rid of her, she's still here._

"So, if two being merge they become one?" Seulgi asks.

"Yes. The more the one doing the ritual consumes of the sacrificed, the more they become like them. They start to think like the sacrificed, the more they act like them, in some cases they even start to look alike."

Seulgi looks uncomfortable. "Why did Soonyoung have this journal? Do they work? Is this a thing that he - "

Seulgi cuts herself off and looks at Wonwoo.

_She's still here. She's still here. She's still here._

"Did Soonyoung do something bad? Is that why he's gone?" Seulgi asks, voice trembling and Wonwoo motions her over to give her a hug.

Seulgi sits on the arm rest of the chair and hugs Wonwoo, arms around her neck and hunched over, blocking their visitors from view.

Wonwoo pats her back, eyes squeezing shut and arms tightening around her sister.

_She's here, she's here, she's here she's here she's here she's not gone she's here I didn't get rid of her she's HERE SHE'S NOT GONE YOU WILL NEVER GET RID OF ME -_

"Did Soonyoung do something bad?" Seulgi asks and Wonwoo blinks her eyes open. Seulgi pulls back and looks down at Wonwoo, eyes dewy and face flushed red and Wonwoo feels her heart swell with sadness and affection.

_She's sixteen_. _She's so young, she's so young, she's sixteen._

"No. No, never." Wonwoo croaks out, "Soonyoung would never do something bad. You know him. He would never hurt anyone. We don't know why he left or _if_ he left or what - what happened, but Soonyoung would never do anything bad."

Seulgi's bottom lip trembles but she nods, taking a deep breath and blinking her tears away.

"I'm - I wanna go out, for - for a bit. To the corner store." She stutters out quietly, "Can I?"

Wonwoo nods, "Yeah. Take some cash from my wallet. Take your time. Be careful."

Seulgi smiles at her, leaving the living room without glancing at Jeonghan or Mingyu.

Seulgi leaves with a quiet click of the apartment door, tapping away at her phone and keys jingling in her pocket.

An awkward silence settles over them, Wonwoo staring blankly at the ceiling while Jeonghan stays stock still and Mingyu stares at her.

"Saturday. I need you to bring me Seungcheol's Sin, Mingyu." Wonwoo breathes out, "Can you do that?"

"Seungcheol's Sin?" Jeonghan asks, "You saw him?"

Wonwoo blinks at him, "He was hovering over his shoulder. The one with black hair and all white. He looked ready to cry. Did you not see him?"

Jeonghan frowns at her, "All white? That's not - "

"That's not Seungcheol's Sin. It's _his_." Mingyu says, mouth curling up in amusement when Wonwoo snaps her head to look at him, "Seungcheol's Sin is... someone else."

Wonwoo turns her gaze back to Jeonghan. "That was... That one was yours?"

"He's not... He's not _mine_." Jeonghan says lamely, eyes fixed on the coffee table, "His name is Minghao. He - "

"Your Sin was there? He just - _that one_ is yours? The one that just stared and - and - " Wonwoo takes a deep breath, fingers digging into the fabric of the armchair, Jeonghan shakes his head.

"He couldn't - I made him be there, he had to be there, he was so disappointed - "

Wonwoo interrupts, "We'll deal with that later. Who's Seungcheol's Sin?"

"Junhui. A Sin of Greed." Mingyu says, "Flashy. Slippery. Annoying."

"Don't get along?"

"He's... Not the easiest to get along with."

"Minghao says the same.." Jeonghan says, "I've know Seungcheol for a while and I've never seen him. Seungcheol says it's because Junhui doesn't like being seen by people not worth his time."

"Had I not known better, I would've thought he was a Sin of Pride." Mingyu says, disdain clear in his eyes, "With the way he believes no one is worth his time. It's a miracle he chose to deal with a human after this long."

And it's amusing to see Mingyu so annoyed by another of his kind. The way his mouth is set on a frown, his eyebrows furrowed. Wonwoo smiles.

"How do you even know him?" She asks.

Mingyu hesitates.

"I was there when he died." Is all he says.

Wonwoo doesn't press the issue any further.

"I want you to kill Junhui." Wonwoo says because she knows she no match for a Sin. Not at all and why does it matter if she has Mingyu to kill him for her? "And I want to bring his head to Seungcheol. I want you to kill him so he knows that nobody can help him anymore. So he knows that he's at my mercy. I want to kill him. I want to be the last thing he sees."

Mingyu smiles at her. "And it will be that way. I will bring Junhui to you. I will make him kneel before you and I will break him into a million pieces for you. And we will watch as helplessness bleeds into Seungcheol's eyes when he sees that his Sin is no match for you."

_He's right here._

"I want you to distract him until I get to his house." Wonwoo says to Jeonghan. "I will watch Mingyu take care of his Sin and then we will come after him."

"How will I distract him?"

"It doesn't matter how, Jeonghan," Wonwoo says, voice raised, "You just have to keep him in your house until we get there and if that means having to fuck him for hours I expect you to do so."

Jeonghan is glaring at her, fists white with rage, whole body trembling.

"You can't make me do something I don't want to do."

"I can and I will. I own you and every single thing in your life. I will kill everyone you know and I will tie you to me like a dog on a leash, I will make you carry around the eyes of you family, I will skin them and hang them on the walls of your home so you never feel safe again. You will do what I tell you to do. Understood?"

"... Understood."

"And I never said you have to fuck him. I said _if_ you have to. Maybe you can just knock him out and tie him up. Did you think about that?"

"He's no match for Seungcheol though. Not physically. That's why he knows he has to fuck him to keep him distracted." Mingyu says.

"Aren't you knowledgeable about Seungcheol? Are you sure you're not the one who's qualified to fuck him to keep him distracted?" Jeonghan snarls, "Mind your own fucking business, demon."

" Enough!" Wonwoo says rising from her seat. "You know what you have to do, Jeonghan. Don't fuck this up."

Jeonghan climbs to his feet, storming through her apartment while he gets his things and leaves with a slam of the door.

"Get ready, sweetheart." Mingyu says, "Because to find Junhui we're going to have to go back to where we sealed our contract."

_The hallway._

-

When Seulgi comes back, Wonwoo is in the kitchen. Alone.

Seulgi joins her in making dinner. It's quiet for a moment, both in deep thought before Seulgi says, "So... Mingyu, huh?"

"What about him?"

"There's something... Off about him." Seulgi says, eyes narrowed and right hand clutching the knife she was using to cut an onion. She uses it to gesture in front of her as if she could see Mingyu standing in front of her. The knife slowly traces a circle in front of her, her eyes no longer narrowed but they have a look like she's far away.

"Off, but familiar." She says softly.

"He's not... that bad." Wonwoo says after a while.

"But he's bad?"

"He just needs some getting used to."

"What does Jihoon think about him?" Seulgi asks once they're sitting down on the dinner table. She says it around a mouthful of food and Wonwoo makes a face at her.

"They don't know each other. They saw each other just today."

"Oh. Isn't he - " Seulgi pauses as she thinks, "You guys are obviously familiar with each other and Jihoon knows nothing about him."

"We're adults Seulgi. He has friends I don't know and I have friends he doesn't know. It's not a big deal."

"No, but... you didn't keep Jeonghan a secret."

Wonwoo stares at Seulgi, "I'm not keeping Mingyu a secret. Besides, Jihoon already knew Jeonghan."

"I dunno I just... I feel like you're keeping a lot of things from us and that's gonna... that's gonna push Jihoon away. You're looking for Soonyoung and Jihoon doesn't even know. Not about the journals, not about the research."

Seulgi knows Wonwoo is keeping several things to herself and she asks. She sees and she asks and insists for answers.

Jihoon is slowly but surely getting involved, but not entirely on his own will. He's seen the books. He's seen Jeonghan slaving away, translating them. He asked something once and didn't say anything afterwards.

_You look like you know something... something you shouldn't._

Wonwoo can't keep all her sins to herself and she doesn't want to burden Jihoon with what she's done. Wonwoo doesn't want to lose him. Everything she's willing to do might drive him away and if he tries to say anything against her -

Wonwoo doesn't want to think about it. Not right now. She'll talk with him, properly, after she visits Seungcheol with Mingyu and Jeonghan.

If he wants to know, he'll know.

They stay silent for a while.

"You know, something about Mingyu bugs me."

"What does?"

"He acts like he has some claim over you."

"Some claim over me?"

"It's in his actions, I think. He acts like - like he's at _home_. And it... It sounds crazy and it annoys me, but it - it makes sense. It's like he's been around him before, like he's always been - " Seulgi cuts herself off, a far away look in her eyes again.

_You know she can feel me, right?_

"Seulgi?"

"He has this confidence about his actions like he's so used to you, like you've know him forever." Her sister says blankly, "Like he knows you inside out. It's like he's been _here_ all along."

"Like he's been here?" Wonwoo presses, holding eye contact with her baby sister.

"Yeah. Like he's been here, like he knows - he's just waiting for you to catch up."

Wonwoo is confused and irritated by Seulgi's vagueness, "He's just helping me with Soonyoung's journals."

"How? I thought just Jeonghan was helping you with that."

"He's translating, Mingyu is helping with research. He knows a lot about this type of stuff."

Seulgi hums, "Will he be around a lot more now that Jeonghan finished the first journal?"

Wonwoo doesn't hesitate when she says, "Not if I can help it. Had things gone the way I planned, you wouldn't of had met him."

Seulgi frowns at her. Wonwoo blinks, realizes she said that out loud. "Sorry. He's just... not someone I want you around too much."

"But you can be around him?"

"It's different."

"How?"

"I can take him."

"And I can't?"

"No. You're not like me."

"What does that mean?"

"He can't get to me."

"What, is he trying to brainwash you?"

"Well, he's a slimy bastard. He can get into your head."

"Then why keep him around?"

"Because he's helping me."

_He's helping me with the resentment I was born with, he's helping me with sins I never knew I carried, he's helping me bring Soonyoung back even if it's selfish._

"And I can't? Can't we both help you?"

"You can't. You can't help me like Mingyu can."

"Wonwoo, I don't know what's going on, but," Seulgi says, voice waivering, "Don't push me away. I don't want to lose you too."

"You won't. It's just that... I can handle this by myself. Mingyu and Jeonghan are helping. I don't want you too involved with this."

"How is that of any help? How are am I helpful so uninvolved?"

"It's helpful because you're not worrying about it." Wonwoo says, "There's things I need to handle by myself. Some things that you can't help me with."

Seulgi stays quiet.

Wonwoo sighs, "I trust you. But what's the use of burdening you with something you can't control?"

Wonwoo hopes Seulgi understands, that she will not be bitter about Wonwoo's choices.

"Okay." Seulgi says at last, "Okay. I won't worry about it. I know you'll come to me when you're ready."

-

He was made for Wonwoo.

That, he knows. He knew it the moment he laid eyes on her and watched her drown. He knew it the moment he reached into her and made it so they were linked.

He belongs to her.

He knew it the moment she pleaded for his help, the moment where she sunk a knife into her mother's chest and kept thinking about him.

Him. Him, him, him and only him.

She was trembling, looking into her mother's eyes, watching as she bled out and all she thought of was him.

Yes.

He was made for Wonwoo.

He was made for Wonwoo. He belongs to her.

Had he been human, they'd have a happy life. A normal life. With marriage and kids and a white picket fenced house. He knows it, deep in his being.

Too bad they lived a few hundred years apart.

But, this'll do.

_Make her look at you and only you, worship the ground she walks on, be her right hand, become irreplaceable, become what she needs, what she wants._

He can smell the rage in her, can almost feel it drip on his skin, can feel the cold slip down his spine, can feel his whole body vibrate with the need of her rage.

Mingyu needs Wonwoo. All of her.

So, when she turns to look at him, he thrills.

"Who do you think sent Jihoon that video?"

Her voice is hushed, skin deathly pale in the moonlight and eyes dark and sunken.

She's beautiful.

<

"I don't know." Mingyu responds, "Junhui, maybe. He probably found out that you're not dead. And sent it to Jihoon to mess with you."

"So Seungcheol knows I'm alive?"

"Most likely."

Wonwoo's jaw clenches, "I want to deliver his Sin's head. I want to wave it in front of his face so he knows that I can do whatever I want with him."

Mingyu grins at her, something rolling in his chest - something that he hasn't felt for a long, long, long time. If he ever did.

"And he will be. He will be yours to do and undo. You can hurt him any way you wish and nobody will be able to stop you."

Wonwoo searches his face and turns away, eyes slipping close.

"Good."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I fucking suck, huh?
> 
> I'd like to thank Meg Myers for making music that helped me write this.
> 
> Took me two fucking months to finish this holy SHIT. I did half of it and then I hated it so much I couldn't look at it for fucking weeks dawg. weeks. and then today I opened it and finished it and I'm like. surprisingly okay with it. anyway. this was a pain in the ass to write. this fic is my pride and joy. and it's shit but that's okay because I need something to take my baseless violence and unhealthy resentment out on. man.
> 
> anyway, please let me know what you think! hopefully I'll update a little sooner this time. hhhhhhhaaa. I love u all, see you in the next chapter!


	9. chapter nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She doesn't want him to be afraid of her, not ever. Not him.

_Wonwoo opens her eyes and _sees_._

_She's standing in the hallway, facing the same illuminated painting of a field of flowers she saw when she made her deal with Mingyu. Red, five petaled flowers. Anemone, she thinks. She traces her fingers along the metal frame, shivering when she realizes how cold she is._

Reach in. Reach in. Reach in.

_Wonwoo snatches her hand back, stumbling a few steps back. She turns to look to her left, blinking in surprise when she sees a dark haired woman standing a few feet away, staring at another illuminated painting._

_The woman turns to look at Wonwoo head on as if she can feel her staring. Wonwoo is surprised to see ice blue eyes, eyelashes so thick it seems like she's wearing eyeliner. Her throat twinkles, silver shining and clinging onto her skin. The woman holds out a hand to her, rings and bracelets glittering with every fluid movement, and Wonwoo feels her face heat up._

What a beautiful woman.

_The woman's mouth is moving and Wonwoo can't make out the words._

_I want to hear, I can't hear. I can't understand yet._

_The woman smiles, staring past Wonwoo and Wonwoo turns her head to follow her line of sight._

_There's another illuminated painting to Wonwoo's right and Soonyoung stands in front of it._

_Wonwoo's heart speeds up. Her stomach flips. Her hands starts to shake._

_Soonyoung! She wants to scream, Soonyoung, where have you been!_

_Her mouth opens but nothing comes out, no matter how much she tries._

_Soonyoung doesn't turn to look at her._

_Not even once._

-

Wonwoo wakes next to Mingyu.

She shoots up, hair sticking to her face and gasping for air. She's trembling all over, head feeling light and like it's spinning. She tries to focus on something, anything, but her head won't stop spinning. All she can see is black, black, blue.

She knows she's speaking, she knows she's speaking, calling out for Soonyoung, but she can't hear herself at all - there's a ringing in her ears that won't go away.

Mingyu sits next to her, holding her hands as she struggles to breathe. She blinks and blinks until she can focus on his face.

His eyes glitter in the dark, his eyebrows furrowed and he's the most comforting thing Wonwoo has ever seen.

_I can give you the whole universe if you so wish._

"Mingyu." She wheezes out, struggling to pull her hands out of his, "Mingyu."

His mouth moves but Wonwoo can't hear a thing. He lets her hands go so she can grasp his shirt in her fists. He pulls her close and the thought about being close to him no longer makes her skin crawl like it did before.

Wonwoo welcomes the warmth of Mingyu's embrace.

"Help." Wonwoo wheezes, "Please."

Wonwoo only feels as Mingyu's hand smooths down her back over and over, chest rising and falling as he breathes.

Wonwoo follows, trembling with every breath Mingyu takes. She doesn't loosen her grip on Mingyu at all until she can hear properly again.

"There we go." Mingyu says. He shifts until they both rest against the headboard.

Wonwoo's wheezing dies down and she's left huffing against Mingyu's shoulder with her eyes closed. Her hands are still clutching at his clothes, so she pries them off. She flexes her fingers when she feels how stiff they are. She begins to fiddle with her necklace, finding comfort in the warmth it seems to naturally give.

Maybe it's because it's always touching my skin. Because it's always with me.

"Mingyu, can I ask you something?" Wonwoo asks after a while.

"Anything, sweetheart."

"What happened to my tongue?"

Wonwoo pulls away from Mingyu to lie down, staring at the ceiling and trying to remember who else she dreamed of besides Soonyoung.

Mingyu lies down on his side next to her, "Your tongue seems perfectly normal to me."

"Yeah, but when you gave it back you made it longer than normal."

"Oh, that." Mingyu hums. Wonwoo closes her eyes, blue imprinted on the back of her eyelids. Blue eyes. Black hair. "That didn't happen here. And by the time we go back you'll be able to make it normal on your own."

"Where did it happen then?"

"Where we all go when we die."

"Heaven? Hell?"

"No. It's here, but only you. Quiet, lonely, cold."

Wonwoo opens her eyes again and turns her head to stare at Mingyu.

"Are you telling me heaven and hell aren't real?"

"No. Neither is God. Neither is the devil or demons or angels. There are only the Sin, the True, and the Universe. The True were born from the Universe just like we were born from the True."

"Who's the Universe?"

"The beginning, the end, all. It's not human. It's not a True. It's not a Sin. It is more than that."

Wonwoo takes it all in.

"There's something bigger than the True?"

"Yes. But it's abandoned us. Nobody has heard from it since it gave life to the True."

Wonwoo turns to look at the window behind Mingyu. The sun is rising. It's only a matter of time before her alarm goes off, before Seulgi wakes up, before she has to pick up Jeonghan, before she has to go to work.

It's only a matter of time.

Wonwoo looks at Mingyu again.

"I wanna tell Jihoon everything."

-

Seulgi finds Mingyu in their kitchen again. She immediately gravitates to Wonwoo's side, face carefully blank.

"Don't you have your own house?" She asks in the most polite way. She turns so her back is to Mingyu and misses the way a wide smile splits his face.

Wonwoo wants to claw it off.

She takes a sip of her coffee instead.

Mingyu locks eyes with Wonwoo and she knows he's asking for permission to talk to her. She shrugs and he must take it as a yes because he sighs and says, "Jealous I'm spending so much time with your big sister?"

Seulgi's shoulders stiffen and she grabs a bowl out of the cupboard. She walks past them both as she fixes herself some cereal. She doesn't answer Mingyu at all.

"I never said that. I just think you're taking a liking to spending your mornings in our home." Seulgi says at last, turning to face Mingyu. Her mouth is full of cereal and it makes Wonwoo glare. "There's nothing wrong with that. I _guess_."

"Well, I'm glad you're not too upset about that since I'll be coming around a lot more."

"...I'm gonna go finish getting ready." She says, walking away with her bowl.

"Did you annoy her on purpose?" Wonwoo asks when she's gone.

"No." Mingyu sighs from on top the counter, "You can tell clear as day that she doesn't like you trusting me more than her."

"I don't trust you more than her." Wonwoo replies, dropping her mug in the sink. "She's just upset you know what's going on and she doesn't."

"She will, one day. And she'll thank you for not burdening her so young, she'll thank you for looking out for her. She won't hate you. Not ever. You don't have to worry about that." He glances at Wonwoo and shifts on the counter, spreading his legs apart when Wonwoo comes to stand in front of him.

An invitation.

Wonwoo stares at him for a minute.

"I'm gonna finish getting ready. Gonna call in sick while I'm at it."

She leaves him alone in the kitchen, glancing back just in time to notice the smile on his face.

-

Wonwoo drops off Seulgi at school. Her sister waves goodbye to Wonwoo and Jeonghan, completely ignoring Mingyu.

"What did you do to piss her off?" Jeonghan asks Mingyu. He's leaning on the armrest between the seats, chin on his fist.

"Called her jealous." Mingyu replies. "I don't think she likes sharing her sister with me."

"Oh." Jeonghan says. Wonwoo can see him glance at her. "Where are we going again?"

"Jihoon's house. I'm gonna talk with him."

"Chat with him? Why? What did he do?" Jeonghan asks, straightening up. "Jesus, I thought you would never hurt him."

"What? Why would I hurt him?" Wonwoo asks, "I would never hurt him. Ever. I'm just gonna tell him everything."

Jeonghan frowns at her, "You're gonna tell him everything?"

"Yes. I can't let him get in my way Saturday. Cause then I would have to - " Wonwoo cuts herself off. "I just want him to understand."

"I thought he knew." Jeonghan says, "You said - "

"He found out about what Seungcheol did. Not about Mingyu. Or you. Or Junhui."

"Oh." Jeonghan stays quiet for the rest of the ride.

When they arrive to Jihoon's house, Jeonghan won't stop fidgeting, standing shoulder to shoulder with Mingyu as they wait behind her.

The door swings open and Jihoon stares up at all of them.

He's in shorts and a t-shirt, hair wet and face a dewy pink. He looks tired, eyes swollen and with dark circles under them.

"Wonwoo?" He says, "What's going on?"

"Can we come in?" She asks.

Jihoon's eyes flit from Jeonghan to Mingyu to her before moving aside to let them in. Wonwoo steps in, Mingyu and Jeonghan stepping in after her. Jihoon leads them to his living room, sitting down on the middle of his couch.

"Take a seat." Jihoon says, patting the spot next to his.

Jeonghan plops down to his right, Wonwoo sits next to his left and Mingyu places himself on the arm rest next to Wonwoo.

"We need to talk." Wonwoo says, "I have a lot of explaining to do."

"You don't have to tell me anything, I'm sorry for springing it up on you. I just want you to know I'm here for you, Whatever happens."

"Don't be sorry. I know you care about me. I would react the same way if anyone hurt you. I just didn't want to burden you. It's a lot."

Jihoon reaches over to hold her hand.

"Before I can tell you everything, I need to show you something." Wonwoo says, "Can I have a glass of water?"

Jihoon nods, moving to stand up before Wonwoo stops him.

"I'll get it." Wonwoo turns to look at Mingyu before she leaves.

Mingyu waits for Jihoon to get his eyes off Wonwoo's retreating figure. When Jihoon finally looks away and does meet his eyes, Mingyu is already staring him down. It makes Jihoon scowl up at him.

"My name is Mingyu. We met the other day, when you upset Wonwoo."

Jihoon looks away from him, "I'm Jihoon."

"I know."

Mingyu shifts his focus away from Jihoon, standing from where he's perched on the couch, "Jeonghan. I'm going to need you to stand up."

Jeonghan looks at him, wary, "Why?"

"We're gonna show Jihoon something."

"I don't want to."

"Get up." Mingyu says, "Or I'll make you get up."

They glare at each other before Jeonghan stands from his seat. He faces them both, arms spread wide.

"Is this good - "

Before Jeonghan can finish, Wonwoo has a knife buried on the side of his neck.

"More than enough." Wonwoo says from behind him.

Wonwoo places a hand on Jeonghan's mouth and yanks the knife outwards. It doesn't budge so Wonwoo let's Jeonghan's body fall to the floor instead.

There's a horrible gurgling coming from his throat.

Mingyu approaches to crouch over the body.

"Next time do it below where the jaw meets the ear." Mingyu says, pointing above where the knife is stuck, "And the flat side has to be facing you. The sharp edge has to be facing _away_ from you."

Mingyu pulls the knife out, plunging it in where he had said before pulling in his direction. This time the knife cuts through smoothly.

"Ah." Wonwoo says. "Okay."

"Not bad for a first try."

"Wonwoo - " Jihoon says, cowering on the couch. "Wonwoo, what did you do?"

Wonwoo blinks, turning to stare at Jihoon's stricken face.

"Jihoon, it's okay - "

"No, it's not! Why did you do that? What the fuck!"

Jihoon scrambles off the couch, putting distance between them and it makes Wonwoo's heart squeeze.

She doesn't want him to be afraid of her, not ever. Not him.

"Jihoon, I can explain, please calm down, it's gonna be okay - "

"Wonwoo, please, what is going on? I thought we were going to talk."

"We are! But I needed to show you this first or you'd - " Wonwoo approaches Jihoon and he makes sure the couch is between them, "Jihoon, please, I'd never hurt you."

"Wonwoo, you killed someone in my house, in front of me, someone you know, someone you called a friend - "

"Friend? He was never my friend, he owes me. He owes me and has to do what I say."

Jihoon tries to flee the room but Mingyu stops him, shoving him and making him fall down to the floor.

"Don't hurt him!" Wonwoo snaps, rushing to kneel next to her best friend. She looks up at him with disgust, "What's wrong with you? What's your problem?"

Mingyu rolls his eyes but doesn't answer and returns to stand over Jeonghan's body.

Jihoon scrambles back to get away from them, hand slipping on the pool of blood around Jeonghan. He looks down at his stained hand and begins to scream.

"Oh, god. No, please no, no, no! Oh my god!"

"Look at me!" Wonwoo says, holding Jihoon's face between her hands, "Jihoon, please look at me. Don't look at him, don't look over there."

Jihoon blinks his tears away, nodding as best as he can with Wonwoo holding him in place.

"Breathe. Breathe and I'll explain." Wonwoo takes deep and exaggerated breaths, encouraging Jihoon to follow along. "That's it. Okay. Good."

Jihoon stops heaving in gulps of air and when Wonwoo let's him go, he doesn't turn to look at Jeonghan's body.

"You - you killed him."

"Yeah. Yeah, I did."

"Why?"

"Because he hurt me, Jihoon. And he let others hurt me. He watched as I was raped, he cut off my tongue. He performed a ritual with the one who raped me because they are greedy. They hurt others to get things the easy way and it wasn't enough. He killed me first, Jihoon. He stabbed me and threw me into a river."

"But you're - you're here."

"Yes! I am! And it's because Mingyu saved me."

"What? I don't - You killed him, Wonwoo, what does this have to do with - " Jihoon lifts a shaky hand and places it on Wonwoo's face. Wonwoo can feel the stickiness from blood and sweat on his palm, "Wonwoo, I don't know - I don't know what to do, you - you killed him. You killed somebody - "

Wonwoo takes Jihoon's hand away from her face, holding them between hers and squeezing gently, "You won't do anything against me."

"Wonwoo - "

"You won't." Wonwoo licks her lips, "Because he hurt me and you couldn't do anything about it. And you know - deep, deep down - that you would've helped me do this if I had asked you from the start."

Jihoon stays silent.

"Because we are - we're family. I will do anything to protect you, like I'll do anything to protect Seulgi and Soonyoung. And you'll do anything to protect us too. We're the pillars and if - if one of us falls, so does everyone else."

"Yeah." Jihoon croaks outs, "Yeah. Okay."

Wonwoo pulls Jihoon in for a hug and let's him cry because he's never let her down when she needed him most and she'll be damned if she lets him down now when he needs her the most.

His hands clutch at the back of her shirt and Wonwoo wonders if his hand will leave a stain on it like it did on her face.

"It's okay. It's okay. We can bring him back. We'll bring him back."

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry you couldn't tell me. I'm sorry you were hurting so bad. I'm sorry I couldn't help you shoulder this burden." Jihoon hiccups, "I'm sorry you're hurting bad enough to hurt someone else."

"I had to do it." Wonwoo says, "Because then you wouldn't believe me."

"Believe you? I would! If you told me he had hurt you, I would've believed you! How could I not?"

"I know, I know. But not about - not about Mingyu." Wonwoo says. Jihoon's head snaps to stare at Mingyu, who's still hovering over Jeonghan's body.

They lock eyes and neither of them look away. Jihoon's eyes are swollen and red, Mingyu's stare is blank and tense.

"What about him?"

"There's no easy way for me to say this." Wonwoo licks her lips. "Look at me, please?"

Jihoon turns back to her.

"He's helping me. He can help us. In so many ways. He - he saved me. He helped me when Jeonghan and his friends hurt me. He's a demon. He's a demon. And he's gonna help me. He's gonna help us."

Jihoon doesn't say anything, staring at her with his mouth agape.

"What? Wonwoo, what? What are you saying? Wonwoo, Jesus - "

"No! No, no, no. Look. Come here. Come with me." Wonwoo scrambles to Jeonghan's side. Her hands touching Jeonghan's cooling body. She glances back at Jihoon, who hasn't moved from his spot.

She reaches over to wrap a hand around his wrist. She tugs gently.

"Come on. Please. Just listen. Just - just watch."

Jihoon nods, "Okay."

He crawls to kneel next to her.

"Mingyu." Wonwoo says, tilting her face to look up at him. "Bring back Jeonghan. Please?"

Mingyu looks down at them with a blank face, eyes darting to where her hand is holding Jihoon's wrist.

When Mingyu makes no move to help, Wonwoo rises to her feet.

"Bring him back. You have to bring him back." Wonwoo says, stepping over Jeonghan's body to stand closer to Mingyu. "I want you to bring him back."

"What, to console him?" Mingyu sneers, gesturing down at Jihoon, "To make him stop crying like a bitch? He can't take one death without crying, how pathetic. How is he going to be of any use to you like this? He's only going to burden you."

"That's not for you to decide." Wonwoo seethes, jabbing a finger in Mingyu's chest. "I told you we were going to do this, you agreed, so bring him back."

Mingyu scowls at her before kneeling next to Jeonghan's body. His jeans are soaking up blood but he doesn't seem to care.

Wonwoo returns to Jihoon's side.

Mingyu digs his fingers into Jeonghan's wound, chanting angrily. Wonwoo blinks rapidly as everything begins to spin.

"Wonwoo?" Jihoon says, concerned, when Wonwoo places a hand in front of her to steady herself. Her hand lands in the pool of blood around Jeonghan's body.

She takes Jihoon's outstretched hand and holds it, jerking her chin towards Mingyu.

"Watch. Keep your eyes on Mingyu. Watch. Watch." She urges.

Jihoon turns back to Mingyu and what he's doing. He watches as Mingyu runs his fingers through the wound in Jeonghan's throat and the flesh knits itself back together.

He watches as Jeonghan's chest starts to rise, a wheezing coming from his mouth. He watches as Jeonghan's eyes snap open.

Mingyu stops chanting.

Jeonghan jerks on the floor when he focuses on Mingyu's face. He begins to thrash, feet and arms flailing. Mingyu places a hand on Jeonghan's chest to pin him down while the other hand wraps around his throat.

Jeonghan begins to claw at Mingyu's hands, a yell ripping out of his throat.

Wonwoo starts to blink her dizziness away, watching as Jihoon leaves her to pin Jeonghan's arms down.

"Jeonghan! Jeonghan please calm down!" He says, "It's okay! It's okay, everything's okay!"

"You fucking killed me." Jeonghan wheezes, staring at her, "You killed me!"

"But she brought you back." Mingyu responds, "Wonwoo is kind, isn't she?"

Jeonghan stills on the floor.

Wonwoo's world stops tilting enough that she can stare back at Jeonghan and make out the hatred in his eyes.

"You fucking killed me." He says.

"I did." Wonwoo replies.

"Why did you - "

"How else were we supposed to prove Jihoon I can do this?" Mingyu replies, watching as Wonwoo touches her forehead to the floor. Her arms are wrapped as round her middle and he almost feels sorry for causing her so much pain with his aggressive prayer.

"Anything else! Turn into an animal, change your hair color, change your eye color, change your gender, change your clothes! Literally anything else!" Jeonghan yells at Mingyu.

Mingyu rolls his eyes and squeezes the hand around Jeonghan's throat until he starts thrashing again.

"Stop." Jihoon says, letting go of Jeonghan to try and pry Mingyu's hand off his throat, "Stop it! Please stop!"

Mingyu only sneers at him.

"Mingyu." Wonwoo warns, straightening up.

She looks steady now.

Mingyu releases Jeonghan and moves away from him.

"Your jeans." Wonwoo says, "They're dirty."

Mingyu looks down.

"You can't even tell it's blood." Mingyu shrugs.

"But it's still blood. They're still dirty."

"It'll go away. I can make it go away."

Wonwoo stands from the floor, Jihoon scrambling to her side.

Wonwoo looks at him and knows there's a fear in him now. A fear that, as cruel as it might sound, will make sure he stays out of her way.

"I need you to come over to my place Saturday." Wonwoo says to Jihoon. "Stay with Seulgi for a while, she misses you."

Jihoon nods, eyes tearing up again.

"Okay."

"Take the week off, I'll make sure to tell the boss that you're not feeling well."

"Okay."

Wonwoo pulls Jihoon into a hug. Jihoon hugs her back twice as hard.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"Thank you for everything. I knew i could trust you with anything." Wonwoo pulls away. "No secrets anymore, I promise."

Jihoon doesn't look too happy about it.

"Okay."

-

There's a quiet in the car that Wonwoo doesn't mind.

Jeonghan says nothing about her tears and neither does Mingyu, but it seems he has something to say about Jihoon.

"He's useless."

"I don't give a fuck!" Wonwoo snaps, "Nobody fucking asked you."

"Why would you need him on your side? He's weak, he's pathetic, childish. He'll be of no use to you, ever."

Wonwoo says nothing until they're at a red light. She turns and aims a slap at Mingyu. He doesn't stop it even though he could.

Wonwoo's palm stings and it makes her feel good.

"That's not for you to decide. And let that be the first and last time you put your hands on him with the intention to hurt him."

Mingyu doesn't reply.

Wonwoo ignores the shuffling from the backseat.

"He's gonna hate you." Jeonghan says, a weak laugh coming from him, "Sooner or later he will hate you. It doesn't matter how much you defend him, how much you protect him, how much you give him. He will hate you."

"No he won't. I just - I need him to stay out of my way. I don't want to hurt him. Never. Not him."

"But you would."

Wonwoo doesn't reply. The light turns green and she drives.

"If he got in your way, you would." Jeonghan says, "What counts as getting in your way?"

"Defying her in any way, shape or form. Telling the authorities. Not obeying her unconditionally." Mingyu says, "Trying to hurt Seulgi in any way, shape, or form. Telling Seulgi about what she's done. Threatening Seulgi. As long as you obey her, she'll protect you. Isn't that right?"

Wonwoo doesn't reply and the silence returns. At least she's stopped crying.

"I don't need to explain myself to you." Wonwoo says at last. She parks in front of Jeonghan's house, "Get out."

Jeonghan barks out a mean laugh before he opens the door and steps out.

He sure is a sight - covered in blood, standing on the sidewalk in front of a sunset yellow house.

"See you tomorrow!" He taunts, leaning on the rolled down window of Wonwoo's car.

"Say hi to Minghao for me." Wonwoo replies. It makes Jeonghan glare. His discomfort makes Wonwoo's. "Tell him I'm looking forward to our chat."

Mingyu starts to laugh and he doesn't stop until Jeonghan's out of sight.

-

"It has been so long since I last saw you in a dress."

"It has been some time. I just got tired of looking the same."

"Got tired of being a man, you mean."

"Yes. We know Seungcheol's preferences, and I don't mind at all, but it's been so long since I've seen my original form that I started to miss it."

Minghao stands in the dark hallway, next to Junhui, staring at a painting of a forest. A brown, decaying forest, leaves on the ground and the winter sky sad.

Junhui runs her fingertips over the painting before dipping her hands in and pulling out a jewelry box. It's silver, encrusted with pearls and sapphires.

"I want to look pretty for Her." She says, opening it and turning it to face Minghao, "Come now, stop with that weeping face. Help me choose something to wear."

Minghao looks down at the rings and necklaces, bracelets and earrings. He picks one thing: a white gold band with tiny blue gems.

Junhui waits for Minghao to keep picking, looking up with a raised brow when Minghao doesn't reach into the box again.

"That's it?"

"She'll remember you with this."

Junhui frowns. "I don't need Her to remember me."

"But you want Her to. And you want Mingyu to remember you." Minghao says, closing the lid on the jewelry box and taking it from Junhui. He turns and pushes it back into the painting. "You want him to look at Wonwoo and remember you, you want to leave a mark on Her so you'll always be there. He'll never be able to forget you. Not if She doesn't."

Junhui turns away from Minghao, smoothing down her skirt and tugging at her blouse. She stares thoughtfully at the painting.

"Are you jealous?" She says after a moment, "That I'll be with Her before you?"

Minghao doesn't respond.

"I know you are. After all, you're belong to Envy. You have to be jealous. I get to live within Her before you get to. And She'll remember me for millennia to come. I'll be the first Sin She consumes. Her power will start with me. The Universe will look at Her and it will look at me living within Her and it will know that She is the one. She is the one because of Her suffering and because of my own. She will take down all the True, She will consume the Sin. She will be unstoppable and it will all start with me." Junhui smiles at the painting in front of her, all sharp teeth and black eyes, "It will all start with me and because I am within Her, I will get a taste of what could've been."

Minghao takes Junhui's hand and slips the ring on her, "It's what you deserve. You of all Sins. You who could've been Her."

"Of all the scum I've met in my life, you are the most tolerable." Junhui says with a cocked head, moving away so Minghao's hand slips off her own. She stares down at the ring on her finger. "For that I will take the blame. I will assume responsibility for your actions. So you may be around a while longer, so you may carry on. So everything finally comes to what it's been building up to."

"Thank you." Minghao says.

Junhui smiles one last time before turning around, the soft sound of her bare feet hitting the carpeted floor fading as she walks away from Minghao.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some chapters take a whole lot of me lmaoo wtf
> 
> almost three months to update can u believe that? smh.
> 
> i really have no excuse tbh. started over like three times. it's bad.
> 
> but it's done and I am satisfied.
> 
> please let me know what you think!
> 
> see you in the next chapter <3


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